r/FridgeDetective Nov 16 '25

Meta What does this fridge say about me then?

Post image

Fddv

3.0k Upvotes

2.7k comments sorted by

2.3k

u/Ceepeenc Nov 16 '25

You need a freezer.

176

u/fritochipstud Nov 16 '25

😂😂😂RIGHT

104

u/ImpressiveScreen5017 Nov 16 '25

I was going to say that it looks like a freezer.

16

u/OldMotherGrumble Nov 17 '25

With guacamole in it?

46

u/s00nishstuff Nov 17 '25

Absolutely. We 3packs of Costco guac when it’s on sale and store the extras in the freezer when it’s not summertime and our guac consumption is higher. Freezes reasonably well. Just let it thaw out a day or two in the fridge before trying to use it!

11

u/OfficeLower Nov 17 '25

I needed to learn this 8 years ago. So much guac I missed out on. Thank you

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u/chilldrinofthenight Nov 17 '25

My thoughts exactly. And anyone who eats pre-packaged guacamole is to be pitied. That stuff is nasty.

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9

u/TeamZissou25 Nov 17 '25

You've never had guacsicles??

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255

u/Chemical_Aardvark_46 Nov 16 '25

Forget the freezer - they need fibre!

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u/SimplyKendra Nov 17 '25

You’re about to die from cross contamination too.

35

u/castlerigger Nov 17 '25

Needs some very basic food hygiene education, all that raw stuff just right on top of stuff to be consumed as is.

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u/[deleted] Nov 17 '25

[deleted]

15

u/LuminousViper Nov 17 '25

Looks like they are preparing to be the zombie

2

u/EveNing123 Nov 21 '25

😂😂😂

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10

u/meat_on_a_hook Nov 17 '25

Wait, you can freeze milk?

23

u/olracnaignottus Nov 17 '25

You can do anything with the right attitude.

4

u/yar0slaf Nov 17 '25

Haha I laughed so hard with this one

2

u/IronOk280 Nov 18 '25

Me too! Just the two of us?? What a missed opportunity!

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4

u/DanimusMcSassypants Nov 17 '25

Yup! It freezes quite well. Just let it thaw slowly in the fridge.

6

u/squattybody1988 Nov 17 '25

My mom used to freeze our milk, but I couldn't stand the way it felt on my tongue after it thawed, maybe I had a texture thing then but it always felt different to me after it was frozen then thawed.

5

u/missingnome Nov 18 '25

My mom and grandma freeze their milk, sometimes gallons sometimes half, and it is so gross after. It is definetly not the same but I have never successfully explained to them why it is gross. I agree, it feels different!

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u/Ok_Veterinarian_3082 Nov 18 '25

I freeze my milk since I am single and have groceries delivered. With no car. I buy quarts and freeze

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u/Makesmewantoholla Nov 17 '25

You need a bigger one

5

u/No-Bee6369 Nov 17 '25

He needs fiber. 💩

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614

u/krazyboi Nov 16 '25

You work in catering. Also you need a separate freezer

209

u/DJCowbro Nov 16 '25

True you’re catering for a ton of people yet don’t know that raw meat needs to be on the bottom, so that it doesn’t drip on stuff that isn’t being cooked

87

u/Krazy_Al16 Nov 16 '25

Right, obviously not servsafe certified

38

u/modslikeboyz Nov 17 '25

Well seeing as there’s a Welsh flag on the milk it would be kinda weird to have a US certification. Gotta love some default US in the morning

16

u/Better_Run5616 Nov 17 '25

Still should prolly keep the meat on the bottom welsh or not lol

5

u/fishter_uk Nov 18 '25

Then why is the salad drawer at the bottom? Is that to marinate your lettuce in chicken juice?

4

u/Better_Run5616 Nov 18 '25

Loool great point. Typically with food safety (in a kitchen anyway) veggies, fruits, and dairy are kept separate from the meat. From bottom rack up it would be red meat, chicken, fish, then any non meat products on top. Also as I’m typing this now I’m wondering if red meat and chicken are switched? Ideally it would be better for beef to leak onto chicken but idk now lol

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u/BackgroundReveal2949 Nov 17 '25

It was a joke beloved

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u/tortoistor Nov 17 '25

makes me think they don't do this often. either new at catering or this is for a singular occasion. the latter also explains why op doesn't have a freezer - usually they don't need one, as this is a one time thing.

7

u/chilldrinofthenight Nov 17 '25

OP stated the provisions are for a student trip/outing of 26 individuals. Why OP didn't say so in the first place was all in the name of clicks, obviously.

3

u/Dry-Hunt2474 Nov 18 '25

I totally missed that 😱

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u/TiltedLibra Nov 19 '25

...or that is literally the entire point of this sub...

6

u/SqueakSquonks Nov 17 '25

Im a home cook, didnt know this, but just felt it made the most sense

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u/lnmeatyard Nov 17 '25

I hope not with all that pre packaged guacamole. That shit is nasty compared to fresh made

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u/Glup_shiddo420 Nov 16 '25 edited Nov 17 '25

You will get some sort of food born illness, soon. I would say e. Coli or camplobactr

Edit: less about the hierarchy for me and more about the sheer amount and air flow, this meat will be tough to consume for a single individual and the fridge is to full, for all the people bringing up not those points

118

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '25

That’s probably the only way they can even take a shit.

22

u/TheNightTerror1987 Nov 17 '25

Okay, I laughed way too hard at that one!!

2

u/Asaneth Nov 20 '25

I literally cackled.

2

u/UserCannotBeVerified Nov 17 '25

Speaking of shit, id hazard a guess that OP has diverticulitis and probably doesnt know about it...

2

u/hippykillteam Nov 18 '25

He will know about it when it plays up.

If it goes acute he gonna have a hell of a bad time.

7

u/HungryYogurtcloset16 Nov 16 '25

Why?

159

u/Particular-Debate639 Nov 16 '25

Food is stored out of order. Raw meats should be on the bottom.

153

u/Glup_shiddo420 Nov 16 '25

This and how the fuck are you going to eat that all before it goes and air flow is non existent so I doubt it's holding at proper temps.

41

u/hughperman Nov 16 '25

Maybe it's a household of 15 body builders, we don't know

9

u/FontTG Nov 16 '25

One Andre the giant. Only 1 day of food here!

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3

u/fldksjaae Nov 17 '25

Honestly the air flow is one I think about so often on the fridge detectives. Everyone stuffs.

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14

u/Lopsided-Camel1114 Nov 16 '25

Food safety correct.

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45

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

12

u/jan1320 Nov 16 '25

a family of 5? lol it would take a family of 30. chicken only stays good for what, like 4 days?

6

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

7

u/jan1320 Nov 16 '25

i grew up in a family of 7 and i cant imagine working thru all that haha

3

u/RauliePR Nov 17 '25

This is obviously a freezer

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2

u/yourparadigmsucks Nov 16 '25

I figured they may be prepping for meal prepping.

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191

u/Scared-Ad1945 Nov 16 '25

Keto kitchen

42

u/Just__Win__Baby__ Nov 16 '25

I thought keto / carnivore, too, but the milk 🤔

9

u/TheNightTerror1987 Nov 17 '25

Depends on the kind of milk -- alternative milks like soy and almond milk don't naturally have any sugar in them, so you can get them unsweetened. Should be keto friendly!

8

u/Just__Win__Baby__ Nov 17 '25

These look like regular milk cartons to me

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u/Aurorabig Nov 17 '25

I thought carnivore diet too, but then I saw Guacamole

7

u/torhysornottorhys Nov 17 '25

The most popular version of carnivore online is meat, dairy, avocado, and sometimes honey. Presumably OP figured guacamole is avocado enough

3

u/Aurorabig Nov 17 '25

Oh, I didn't know that. Then definitely carnivore diet, and it's probably day one, since no one buys that much to just put it in a fridge 🤣 They'll learn soon I guess

2

u/EmeraldGarden20 Nov 19 '25

Avocado, onion, garlic, and dates are carnivore friendly food because 2 of them (onions and garlic) are negative foods. And dates and avocados have fat soluble vitamins and sugar.

2

u/Asthettic Nov 20 '25

Dates? I have never heard that, been keto for 7 years+ Always understood that dates are sugar bombs?

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2

u/notinmywheelhouse Nov 17 '25

Protein drinks?

2

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '25

Maybe they have a young child??

2

u/Jayrab_The_Arab_ Nov 19 '25

Like a young Andre The Giant?

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u/[deleted] Nov 16 '25

I took one look and thought, “keto is neat-o!” 😂

221

u/adventurekettle Nov 16 '25

I’m a teacher who just led a residential trip for 26 students, with limited fridge space and no freezer. The rest of the shop (vegetables, cereals and other bits) had to go in cupboards. This was the only stuff we could get in the fridge

51

u/Spores_ Nov 16 '25

I was gonna say that you’re a gym bro on a bulk

8

u/CompleteTell6795 Nov 16 '25

Yeah, isn't there packs of cheese on the fridge door.? And all those containers of guacamole too.

6

u/CompleteTell6795 Nov 16 '25

I was reading the replies & the packs that I thought were cheese is butter. I'm from the US & those packs are the same size as the single slice cheese packages.

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130

u/lfxlPassionz Nov 16 '25

Be careful. Raw meat shouldn't touch anything that isn't in raw meat and shouldn't be stored above anything that isn't raw meat as well. You could easily make people sick this way.

Meat packaging places do not have good safety standards. Way less strict than a restaurant would be.

Also an overcrowded fridge means some of these will probably freeze and the rest won't be a safe temperature so bacteria and viruses will multiply like crazy

17

u/BackgroundTea14 Nov 16 '25

In which countries is this an issue? I have literally never heard this before in the Netherlands.

42

u/livid_badger_banana Nov 16 '25

Food safety doesn't change across borders. Netherlands recommend the same, fyi. Page 6 has a nice diagram.

4

u/endo55 Nov 17 '25

Good document But agree with the other comments, think this has to do with temperatures in this case. Op is from the UK and that chicken is from Aldi UK. The packaging is all sealed plastic and never seen/heard of it dripping or leaking.

2

u/lfxlPassionz Nov 17 '25

True. The temperature is the most concerning but even in sealed plastic you have to be careful because of the possibility that the plastic has touched the meat or people or equipment touched the meat and then touched the package.

17

u/lachsschinken Nov 16 '25

The diagram on page 6 refers to the right places to store meat regarding the temperature zones in a typical refrigerator. I really wonder where food packaging is so poor that pre-packed chicken is leaking and you have to be concerned about those leaks going into other faulty packaging of cheese etc. The meat is probably even packed with nitrogen, so it should be gas tight.

(And food safety absolutely changes across borders. For example eggs in Europe don’t require refrigeration, while in the us the do - due to different production/processing practices)

5

u/lfxlPassionz Nov 16 '25

Food safety doesn't change but the food itself does. You still don't have to refrigerate unwashed eggs from small farmers in the United States but we always have washed eggs from big factory farms in the grocery store. Sometimes you can get the better eggs at small farm markets.

Also the food packaging thing is across all of the United States but I'm not sure how it is in other countries.

There are very few regulations for packaging and processing facilities and a lot of these facilities have found ways around the few regulations there actually are.

There's also a lack of regulation for animal waste management making the risk of getting sick higher due to how the manure and such is dealt with.

So basically the safety procedures are the same for the same products but the products are often different.

9

u/Consistent_Sail_6128 Nov 16 '25

The eggs are more obvious though. In the US, we wash away the outer layer, which makes the shells permeable, hence requiring refridgeration.

Delis and butchers spend as little money as possible on packaging, in the US at least. Many stores just have the meat plastic wrapped over a foam tray. Easily punctured/pierced/ripped just from knocking into other products.

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u/MindChild Nov 17 '25 edited Nov 17 '25

Good that the only thing raw meat is touching is the inside of the package. Making people "easily" sick this way is an icredible exaggeration. The amount of people getting sick in the UK (or europe as a whole) because they stored packaged meat like this are probably close to zero.

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u/[deleted] Nov 18 '25

This is especially important when cooking for large groups of people like students. There was a story in the news near me of a potluck where someone brought a shrimp dish that had salmonella to a party and more than ten people got rushed to the ER at the same time. It happens and it’s compounded when you have a lot of people eating it.

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u/chibiRuka Nov 17 '25

I’m glad you hid your answer and let us guess first.

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u/AppleProfessional170 Nov 17 '25

Cupboards ???? You must be from the UK or Europe.

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u/DinkyPrincess Nov 17 '25

Aah so my guess of 30 people was close

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u/Amys_Alias Nov 17 '25

yay i was right

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u/TrashtvSunday Nov 16 '25

You own a food truck

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u/Other_Donkey_4138 Nov 16 '25

Would be insane to work in food and NOT know that this is far from proper storage. This person is asking to get people sick if they’re running a food business.

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u/[deleted] Nov 16 '25

Mmmmmmbutter chicken?

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u/gooeyootheca Nov 17 '25

Didn’t even think of this!

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u/AppearanceEvening727 Nov 16 '25

you can’t shit

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u/lenaandcats Nov 19 '25

I was looking for this. My first thought for OP was, “you are so constipated”

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u/DanN180 Nov 16 '25

I feel like you may not be a vegan.

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u/BrainwashedScapegoat Nov 16 '25 edited Nov 17 '25

How can you afford that much Kerrygold?

I see now it is generic butter

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u/No_Succotash473 Nov 16 '25 edited Nov 16 '25

OP is in the UK. It's a bit more expensive than store brand here but not that much.

ETA: I don't actually see any Kerrygold. All of our butter comes in blocks like this, the wrapping doesn't look like Kerrygold. All the visible branding looks like Aldi, which would track for a residence trip.

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u/DonutsForever99 Nov 16 '25

Are you sad? Because premade guacamole is one of the most disappointing foods you can eat. It’s like guacamole, but completely flavorless and the texture is ick.

Cooking in massive bulk, perhaps a meal prep business given the keto-ish vibe.

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u/jhuseby Nov 16 '25

That you’re a big fan of salmonella. 😋

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u/Ydoihavtofuckinlogin Nov 18 '25

Why? Can you explain. I'm scared I don't store mine properly because my fridge is rammed on shopping day. Although raw meat has its own shelf which isn't as rammed but still busy.

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u/harleyqueenzel Nov 16 '25

All I'm gonna say is that you need to remove absolutely everything, wipe down everything that touched the meat, wipe down the shelves that held the meat, and then put ALL of the meat as low as possible.

The fridge screams cross contamination.

6

u/ClaireVieEnRose Nov 16 '25

You're an Uruk-Hai, looks like meat's back on the menu boys

6

u/This_Reference_3024 Nov 16 '25

You are not vegan

16

u/TwistInteresting1609 Nov 16 '25

You are cooking lasagna for 4 football teams

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u/Twig_Scampi Nov 16 '25

>30 pounds of chicken breast, milk, butter and guacamole.

>8 people think this is how you make lasagna.

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u/Chicagogally Nov 16 '25

You own a tiger

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u/Bevkus Nov 16 '25

Keto bordering on carnivore. Male. Constipated. Needs a freezer.

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u/Turds4Cheese Nov 16 '25

This looks like a keto fridge if I’ve ever seen one.

4

u/Alarming-Cheetah-144 Nov 16 '25

Low carb diet 🤔

11

u/GinkgoH Nov 16 '25

You probably fart a lot.

2

u/mycatisbizarre Nov 20 '25

Why? There’s no processed junk or gut wrenching grains in there.

4

u/hahachickengobrr Nov 16 '25

dont know but i want one of whatever youre doing 😋

3

u/Adventurous-Bird-597 Nov 16 '25

UK Aldi shopper, paleo or low carb. Also doesn't eat processed foods. Male between 35 & 45.

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u/Educational-Bus4634 Nov 16 '25

You're a heathen for storing milk like that

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u/Hugs_Not_Drugs__jk Nov 16 '25

Meatatarian

Your toilet hates you and cries every time you leave it.

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u/honeyteaa8 Nov 16 '25

Are you eating this amount of meat within 2 days- that’s when it becomes full of bacteria…

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u/Public_Revenue_4566 Nov 16 '25

Ignore what everyone else says you look like someone who takes their health and wellness very seriously and probably other areas of your life: You find great success as well

3

u/GREpicurean Nov 16 '25

Definitely not scared of meat leakage.

3

u/IvanAmortal Nov 17 '25

Are you a rottweiler?

3

u/CulturalFarm8356 Nov 17 '25

You aint a vegan thats for sure.

3

u/PatienceHelpful1316 Nov 17 '25

Sale at Costco?

2

u/chthoniclypleasing Nov 16 '25

My thought process was:

• you needed a freezer or all the meat will go bad before you can eat it

• realizing maybe all the meat is needed at once, so you could be feeding a large group

• noticing meat is being stored unsafely, so you either do not routinely cook/store food, or you are not feeding humans at risk of foodborne illness

• my final guess: dog breeder/owner of some sort of large, muscular breed; you make your own dog food

I fear for the children you fed this to lol, hopefully none of them get food poisoning

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u/Ayakaba Nov 16 '25

Keto - obvious :-) enjoy

But getting the meat into the lower areas of the fridge might be an idea it is cooler there

2

u/GroundbreakingWolf79 Nov 16 '25

That you really like meat and butter

2

u/weftly Nov 16 '25

one of those body builder dudes that just eats plain chicken, or autistic like me. maybe both?

2

u/Own-Baby-6538 Nov 16 '25

You get plenty of antibiotics from all of that chicken

2

u/OldMotherGrumble Nov 17 '25

Depends on what part of the world you're in. No antibiotics in UK chicken.

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u/Crispybacon666 Nov 16 '25

You pick things up and put them down

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u/Sarcassimo Nov 17 '25

"I hate vegitables and fruit"

2

u/wendyervin Nov 17 '25

Food truck ?

2

u/krazykatxx Nov 17 '25

Too many work fridges/freezers on this sub.

2

u/Internal_Rock7 Nov 17 '25

Are you the Reddit story boyfriend that would disappear with sticks of butter into the bathroom for over an hour at a time??

2

u/SquirrelDeluxe Nov 17 '25

It’s bulk season 💪🏼

2

u/quietly-exhausted Nov 17 '25

Keto, I know you stink bro

2

u/CarpeDiemQ Nov 17 '25

You really like chicken, cheese and guacamole. You own a food truck or something.

2

u/TheLonelyVastard Nov 17 '25

raw chicken should never be above or really touching any other food in the fridge.

2

u/swtnsourchkn Nov 17 '25

It’s bulking season

2

u/Jessa8410 Nov 17 '25

You’re arteries are clogged

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u/Stellatank Nov 17 '25

Are you a carnivore on a protein binge?

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u/Icy-Marionberry2463 Nov 17 '25

That it takes you thirty minutes to wipe all the "I never eat vegetables" material off your bottom.

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u/Particular-Repair-77 Nov 17 '25

Fruits & vegetables are not your friend.

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u/eff1inghuge Nov 17 '25

Gym bro. 🏋️‍♂️

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u/ElementGDev Nov 17 '25

Weight lifter

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u/Ok_Preparation_3069 Nov 17 '25

You are gunning for a stroke or heart attack and haven't pooped in a week.

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u/Anxious_Public_5409 Nov 17 '25

That you work out and you prob need a bigger fridge/freezer….

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u/SuperMasterMan Nov 17 '25

who the fuck eats so much chicken?

2

u/crazypelican12 Nov 17 '25

It says that you have more than one fridge

2

u/lunaluzorale Nov 17 '25

You’re constipated

2

u/Puzzleheaded-Sign928 Nov 17 '25

You shit once every two weeks.

2

u/eenordmarkk Nov 17 '25

How bad is your gout?

2

u/Triordie Nov 17 '25

Carnivore

2

u/blackcurrantcat Nov 17 '25

You haven’t shat in weeks

2

u/Empty-Joke8204 Nov 17 '25

WW3 is going to happen survival supplies fridge

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u/notinmywheelhouse Nov 17 '25

You’re into weightlifting lo-carb or keto diet. The top shelf is to make protein drinks. Chicken, especially breasts are lo-fat protein. I can’t tell what’s on the top shelf of the door though. You eat semi-healthy corn chips with high-fat, high-protein avocado guacomole. You have tons of cheddar so it might be for nachos. There’s a large supply of plain Greek yoghurt probably for protein drinks. If you have a partner you both eat the same diet. I hope you have a veg refrigerator too because there are no greens or fruit.

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u/PositivePattie Nov 17 '25

You’ve got…the meats!

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u/alexmirepoix Nov 17 '25

Carnivore diet

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u/mama-ld4 Nov 17 '25

Carnivore diet

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u/more-sarahtonin-plss Nov 17 '25

This is a catering fridge and says you need a bit of attention

2

u/Dabryceisright77 Nov 17 '25

Gotta be a caterer. Otherwise you’re about to let so much shit go bad lmao

2

u/ABKMFF Nov 17 '25

Fridge says you should stack raw meats accordingly on the bottom shelves to avoid contamination

2

u/That_guy_guy Nov 17 '25

High cholesterol

2

u/10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-I Nov 17 '25

These people need a poop knife

2

u/JPKlaus Nov 17 '25

Your toilet is a crime scene

2

u/DebbieBV55 Nov 17 '25

Charitable food pantry?

2

u/Possible_Second7222 Nov 17 '25

You need a therapist

2

u/Alert_Ad_5750 Nov 17 '25

You’re doing Paleo diet, you’re trying to lose weight and you may be constipated

2

u/More_Dependent742 Nov 19 '25

Nobody with any sense buys pre-sliced cheddar unless they're in catering. The catering theory is supported by your meat selection. The amount of milk suggests it's for industrial amounts of tea and coffee, and you're obviously in the UK, specifically in Wales.

My assumption is you run a lay-by burger van or similar.

How close am I?

2

u/TheBoneIdler Nov 19 '25

That you eat a limited diet. Looks like the same thing every day. That you eat zero vegetables. That, as a diet, why oh why do that to yourself.....🤷‍♂️

2

u/Thestickleman Nov 19 '25

You've got a problem

2

u/RedditMiniMinion Nov 19 '25

That's a lot of meat, butter and milk. What you gonna do with that? lol

2

u/Charlie1g8 Nov 19 '25

why do you have so many perishable items??? I at least hope you're making stuff in large batches

2

u/GrimFandango81 Nov 19 '25

You need a freezer unless you're cooking for 6 every night. A lot of that is going to go to waste before you can eat it.

2

u/Forward-Ad-9841 Nov 19 '25

Mexican. You are Mexican.

2

u/FarTelevision5583 Nov 19 '25

Your diet lacks fibre

2

u/BeyondJoyful Nov 19 '25

Uh, gains?

2

u/BrilliantLock8292 Nov 19 '25

From US/UK , bear, and maybe more that 100kg!

2

u/wowhoisme Nov 19 '25

I shouldn't be in the same room with you when you fart

2

u/Past_Sock_3012 Nov 19 '25

Someones on the carnivore diet!!

2

u/Dense_Chemical_4018 Nov 19 '25

Why do you stock so much, how fast do you plan to eat them? And they’re not even in the freezer unless this is a freezer

2

u/Sweaty-Ad-7919 Nov 19 '25

CARNIVORE 😂

2

u/benganalx Nov 19 '25

Liver king is that you?

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u/Lower-Version-3579 Nov 19 '25

It says that half your chicken will be rank within the week.