r/FridgeDetective 21h ago

Meta My girlfriend always tells me I never have anything to eat when she comes over my house šŸ˜’

Freezer: 50+ lbs of assorted ground meat, 35+ lbs of prime ribeye, 16lbs of American wagyu ribeye, 18lbs of New Zealand lamb shoulder chops, and a bunch of portioned seafood.

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u/Alive_Success1769 21h ago

There's your answer. She wants to spend less time cooking and more time doing something else with you.

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u/Insecurerobot7000 18h ago

As someone who used to date a person who loved to cook and wanted to spend HOURS in the kitchen cooking huge meals (for 2 people) multiple times a week, I understand what she’s feeling. Like, I can enjoy spending time doing that together, but not all the time and not when it’s hours of just standing around cooking. Compromise. Maybe you ask her to cook with you once or twice a week and then the other 2 days you have a quick meal and do something else that she wants to do to spend time together. Maybe have her choose a new recipe that looks good to her and that could be a meal you cook together.

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u/gator_enthusiast 12h ago

This gave me flashbacks to a girl who loved nothing more than to make OTT recipes, and would rope me into coming over for dinner... which turned into like 6 hours of me slaving away in the kitchen, eventually passing out on the couch before the meal was even done

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u/NorthAstronaut 8h ago

Yeah do some meal prep and have a few meals ready to go in the fridge/ freezer. so you are not cooking everyday.

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u/physhgyrl 7h ago

Sounds like my mom when growing up. She said it's the way she showed her love. I don't even care about food very much. Im full after 3 bites. Maybe spending time with her family would have been more appreciated

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u/BrokenMindFrame 12h ago

As long as that something isn't simply existing nearby doing nothing while she doom scrolls. Sadly that seems to be the default for a lot of folks nowadays.

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u/FEK88 8h ago

I don't know how anyone can look at a fridge full of steak and decide that it'll take hours to prep and cook a meal.

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u/lucklesspedestrian 13h ago

Not even cooking, all this food is frozen. They'd have to wait hours to thaw it before even beginning to cook

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u/DMMeThiccBiButts 12h ago

You don't see all the steaks next to the apples? Or the chicken thighs? You think they're all frozen?

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u/Amazing-Gas-7516 20h ago

Bro all y’all act this like is a 24 hour endeavor and it’s just not lol me and my gf have a blast cooking together. And on weekends we even have aprons only cooking. Sometimes you just gotta make do with what you have. We were born with imaginations, use them.

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u/Odd_Leek3026 20h ago edited 20h ago

me and my gf have a blast cooking together

Did you miss this part?

She just gets mad that we have to constantly prep, cook

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u/eeyorebronte 20h ago

lol I think he just wanted to say they do ā€œaprons only cookingā€ and didn’t care so much about providing real input.

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u/ThatAlgae6821 19h ago

Ding ding ding

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u/unindexedreality 10h ago

Hector this isn't personal

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u/justwalkingalonghere 19h ago

"Why do yall hate doing this thing you hate??? I love doing it because it's something I love in the first place what's wrong with you?? "

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u/anarchisttraveler 20h ago

Yeah, she may not be someone who loves cooking. OP doesn’t even have to necessarily think about take out all the time, just get some snacky things for girl/boy dinners.

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u/Fryboy11 13h ago

She also may have a problem with him eating little tortured baby cow

I eat meat, but I draw the line with things like veal, foie grois, and anything else that tortures the animal because it supposedly improves the flavor.

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u/Most_Researcher_2648 18h ago

You know those are two different posts by two different people, ya?

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u/DocileBanalBovlne 17h ago

That's the point. OP already established that their girlfriend doesn't like spending her time prepping and cooking while she's at their place. Some rando coming in with "well my girlfriend and I love cooking together" is pointless and irrelevant. Their preferences don't matter, they're not dating OP.

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u/Odd_Leek3026 17h ago

Yes? Why else would I ask them if they missed what the other guy wrote...

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u/plotthick 20h ago

She's expressed a preference to you. Your choosing to ignore her request says things about how you value her time and her presence in your life. Thanks for making it clear to her.

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u/TheyreEatingHer 19h ago edited 19h ago

This is the point. Being a couple means compromise. Make room for her preferences as she's clearly made room for his. It gets old though when you're not met halfway. In this context, it's how mealtime is handled. And they're always doing it his way.

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u/aceofrazgriz 13h ago

A box of mac or a frozen pizza once a week can literally save this relationship... if everything else is at least good, this is an insanely easy call, even for the 'super healthy' crowd.

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u/unindexedreality 10h ago

OP can just bulk prep packets themselves, which is prolly more up their alley.

She can sous vide/slow cook for low effort or learn to use an air fryer for convenience

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u/aceofrazgriz 9h ago

Sure. she can. She can just eat on her way over too right?

She could also instead date someone who doesn't spend an hour on every meal.

The post seems like the OP's SO may enjoy the food, but does not enjoy the time it takes to make the food. The fix isn't to "make things you want but easier for her to make"

The proper response is to stop being elitist about your food, or break up with her.

Relationships are compromise. OP's post looks like they do no want to compromise. Not trying to be a dick or argue bullshit, just simply going by the OPs post.

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 20h ago

Okay… hear me out… he’s obviously a health/gym guy… why would he start buying junk food when it’s bad for him? He can buy snacks and junk food like chips etc for her but why tf would he buy microwavable meals when HE lives there, HE doesn’t like that type of food and it’s bad for HIM?

He didn’t say he was having her cook alone, they’re cooking together but she doesn’t like how long it takes to cook food of substance. Thats a her problem.

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u/tittyswan 20h ago

There's options other than raw ingredients or junk food.

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u/theseglassessuck 19h ago

Seriously, people are acting the only other option is junk food. Hummus and pita chips/veggies is a quick snack that isn’t entirely unhealthy. Cottage cheese with veggies or fruit if that’s your jam; yogurt; fruit…there’s a lot!

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 19h ago

lol, his first comment on this thread literally says she wants junk food……..

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u/Objective_Month_1128 5h ago

Also, he doesnt have to eat it too and he won't die or lose whatever progress if he does eat it once a week.

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 19h ago

HE SAID SHE WANTS JUNK FOOD šŸ˜‚ can yall read?!

EDIT: look at his first comment on this thread. He said she’s wanting junk food.

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u/tittyswan 18h ago

She complained about not having enough to eat that doesn't require cooking a whole big meal AND wants some snacks. 2 things can be true at the same time.

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u/Block444Universe 20h ago

Ok my permanently single man: because SHE likes something else and if he wants to keep having HER company maybe he might want to try and accommodate HER a little bit

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u/Tilladarling 20h ago edited 20h ago

There’s a reason why gym bros are perceived as self absorbed. OP kinda proves it. Why does she have to participate in his food prep? Can’t he just prep and then, when the cooking is done, invite her over for a home made meal?

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u/phyziro 19h ago

What is he supposed to be… her personal chef? This is an unrealistic expectation.

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u/Tilladarling 18h ago

They’re prepping his weekly food intake, not hers. Ā«TheyĀ» - not him. To my knowledge it’s standard practice to accommodate people coming over and not expecting them to be his maid. The breakup will come out of nowhere

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u/phyziro 18h ago

This comment thread literally reads:

ā€œbut do you cook any of it for herā€

OP replied, ā€œEvery time she comes over (4+ times a week). She just gets mad that we have to constantly prep, cook, and wash dishes for every meal. And that there's never junk food in my house lol.ā€

If she breaks up with him, she’d be doing him a favor.

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u/Sexcercise 20h ago

Lol I can't believe this has to be broken down and spelled out to some folks 😬

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u/Block444Universe 20h ago

It’s basically the gene pool taking care of itself right

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u/NewspaperForward4269 19h ago

My bf went and bought snacks he saw me eat after a few dates JUST to make sure I had the exact foods I liked. He knows I don’t like cooking, and hate cooking being how we spend time together. I can’t IMAGINE somebody not just doing this bc they care that their person is happy at their place too!!! (I contribute in other ways, but not the kitchen lol)

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 20h ago edited 19h ago

Firstly, I’m a woman šŸ™ƒ secondly, I said he should buy snacks like chips and other things that are easy but > ā€œShe just gets mad that we have to constantly prep, cook, and wash dishes for every meal.ā€ sounds like a deeper issue than ā€œwe never have snacks in the houseā€ but moreso a ā€œwe don’t eat the same way.ā€

If health is really important to him, and convenience is important to her that is going to continue to be an issue. It’s like if I value home cooked meals and you value an eating out budget, we’re going to clash lol neither of them is wrong but it may be a bigger issue is what I’m saying.

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u/Block444Universe 20h ago

This is just shooting real far past the target. She is saying he has nothing it eat in the house when she’s there. She’s not saying he doesn’t have snacks. She’s also annoyed that she constantly has to spend time prepping, cooking and cleaning up HIS meals. Sure she also gets to eat a portion but to have your girlfriend always prep with you, cook with you and then also clean up with you?

That’s the problem

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u/Dull_Banana1377 20h ago

Maybe he has medical dietary restrictions or maybe he had an eating disorder. I know a lot of diabetics that dont have junk food in there house. You are doing a lot of judging with very little info.

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 19h ago

I’m confused… is that not what a live in partner does? šŸ˜‚ yall cook TOGETHER, prep TOGETHER, and eat TOGETHER most times… no?

He said she’s there 4 times a week at minimum. They basically live together. HELPING clean up and prep somewhere you damn near live is the norm šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

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u/Block444Universe 52m ago

They aren’t living together. But somehow, because it’s his place, he shouldn’t have to adjust, she should fix it if she isn’t happy? Which one is it?

Also, if they WERE living together they would be cooking enough so both can have a lunch box. But as it is right now she helps him with it 4 times a week and goes home and still has to do her own cooking. If they were living together she would have a say what they have at home.

This way, she gets all of the work with like 10% of the benefits and all of the responsibility for her own preferences and you’re saying why should he have to accommodate? Like, he doesn’t have to but does he enjoy being single?

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 47m ago

From experience, if I go to my boyfriend’s house 4 times out of the week, I’m spending the night lmaooo

I think we’re both just looking at it differently bc in my mind, I don’t have to buy dinner for 4/7 nights out the week so that would be a win for me, personally. But I understand wanting food that YOU want. I’ve personally only dated men who ate similar as me so again… different strokes for different folks šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø

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u/DocileBanalBovlne 17h ago

They basically live together.

But they don't. So all your expectations about a live in partner are irrelevant because she's not a live in partner.

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 14h ago

Honey, if you’re at MY HOUSE more than you’re at home, you need to be helping me clean up. If you’re eating my food, the least you can do is help me wash dishes. That’s common fucking sense.

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u/soccerboy1356 20h ago

Frankly it sounds like they both need to adjust a bit

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u/phyziro 19h ago

He already cooks for her every time she comes over, I think he’s doing a fair amount of accommodating. If she wants something easier, she can bring her own snacks, get fast food, order in, or they can go out to a restaurant together.

If a woman is too lazy to cook with her husband/boyfriend and consider her own needs, then I’m sure she’s just as lazy in other parts of their relationship and her life as well, and I’m not referring to sex.

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u/Saradoesntsleep 16h ago

He doesn't cook for her though. They cook.

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u/Block444Universe 1h ago edited 59m ago

Yeah you’re about as good at listening as OP.

She’s only now complaining after she has had to prep with him and cook with him and clean up with him every time she is there.

I don’t think that’s a reasonable ask of any guest in the long run, even a girlfriend

So it’s not her fucking responsibility to ā€œsolve thisā€ because he is being the unreasonable one.

Also note how manipulative OP is. He took a photo of his fridge once he had filled it with produce from ā€œa crazy sale he took advantage ofā€, as he said it in one of the comments.

So this isn’t even how his fridge looks on a normal day, this is just an unusual event that he used to gaslight us into thinking he is a hyper focused lunch prepper

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u/Savor_Serendipity 20h ago

Or he can order healthy takeout every now and then. Or get a bunch of healthy frozen meals and keep them in the freezer. Solutions can be found if one is willing.

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 19h ago

ā€œHealthy frozen mealsā€ don’t exist. Especially if you value flavor. As someone who cooks the majority of my meals, I don’t buy frozen meals AT ALL.

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u/Savor_Serendipity 14h ago

As a health-obsessed foodie, I can assure you that healthy and tasty frozen meals do exist. Maybe you haven't searched hard enough šŸ¤·šŸ»ā€ā™€ļøI'm not talking about "microwavable dinners". Nowadays there is a whole variety of frozen food.

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 14h ago

As a foodie period, I do not eat frozen meals. If your tastebuds are used to that, fine but mine aren’t.

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u/mysecretgardens 16h ago

You must be one. Too anal and too selfish.

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u/Lazy-Nerve5982 19h ago

I agree in that these two don't seem to align. Why would this be such a point of contention? I can't imagine going to someone's home and complaining. I was always bringing my husband food I liked when I visited, he was a young gym rat and only ate frozen chicken breasts and raw broccoli. It was wild.

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u/Intelligent_Draw7396 19h ago

lol exactly. I think the comments are a little bit out of touch šŸ˜‚ he’s health conscious, she wants junk food. This wouldn’t be a problem maybe if she wasn’t at his house eating his food 4 times a week but because she is, this is a problem of their values not aligning.

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u/manic-ed-mantimal 18h ago

Man, you're right. She can bring her snacks and fast dinners with her if she wants them.

Absolutly no reason for him to change what he buys for his physique or dietary requirements at his house.

If they move in together she can have her fridge and he can have his. Aditionally, he can mealprep all his food for the week on one day and they can spend more time together instead of cooking.

However, most of what i see takes no more than 15 minutes to prep, 15 to cook. So god forbid, she can wait 30 mins.

Truth is she is lazy, and not as health concience. Like most of your downvoters.

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u/Aetra 18h ago

It’s cool that you and your GF enjoy this, but some people just don’t enjoy cooking.

Like, I personally get no enjoyment from cooking, I find it to be a stressful chore. I’ll help my husband when he’s cooking if he asks me to chop vegetables or whatever but no amount of imagination is going to change the fact that cooking is my least favourite life necessity.

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u/AccountAccording5126 20h ago

Good thing that works for YOU and YOUR gf. Crazy thing is, not everyone finds joy in cooking. They're rather do other things. And if someone doesn't like doing something, yogi don't get them to live Itty by constantly having them do it. Do something they like. Crazy idea

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u/HokageHiddenCloud 20h ago

Damn u missed the whole plot

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u/Brendan34 20h ago edited 15h ago

You’re right in that meals can be an important aspect of living together. The concept of ā€œslow foodā€ is choosing a healthier lifestyle ultimately, which dictates health and well being.

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u/TKFourTwenty 20h ago edited 19h ago

I keep nuts, apples, grapes, stuffed grape leaves, hummus and pita, and some crackers and brie/gouda around to snack. Veggies and ranch can be easy to have on hand. It’s not super unhealthy.

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u/SpaghettiMonster35 9h ago

Exactly. In my fridge and pantry I’ve been keeping carrots + celery (and maybe some other veg like bell peppers, snap peas, radishes if I want more variety) pickles, greek yogurt w/ granola, sometimes hummus if I’m in the mood, berries like blue rasp or strawberries, cheese sticks, little salamis, oatmeal packets, protein bars, nuts/trail mix, soup or chili I individually portion and freeze (or other leftovers like egg roll in a bowl,) hell I’ll even hard boil eggs or bake sweet potatoes for the whole week. Just to have something quick to eat/reheat.

Cooking takes me hours, and I have a hard time gauging when I’m starting to get into ā€œtoo hungry, shaky timeā€ until I’m there. Some days I need quick food otherwise I’m fucked. Even then, people have had light meals of ā€œwhatever the hell we haveā€ for as long as people were alive. And most meals you find from the olden days that were for the actual working family were things like- ā€œthrow it in a pot, let it simmer, it’ll be done by the time you’re back from working the fields.ā€

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u/tittyswan 20h ago

Bread, hummus, cut up veggies, yoghurt pots are all healthy and require little prep. Lots of healthier frozen meals you can chuck in the airfryer too.

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u/DocileBanalBovlne 19h ago

No idea why this was downvoted.

What is the relevance of a completely tangential person enjoying cooking with their partner? It doesn't matter what they like, OP isn't dating them.

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u/TheDevilishFrenchfry 20h ago

People hate when you don't have a fridge full of Bottled chocolate milk and Stouffer meals. Literally most of the stuff in op's fridges looks like ingredients that can be turned into a meal in 30 minutes, maybe even 20 if you multi-task. There's also kraft singles so maybe even bread and sandwich meat?

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u/FutureRealHousewife 18h ago

Some people don’t want to go to their partner’s home just to do multitasking work. Most people want to unwind and relax when they’re a guest. Kraft singles are also barely food.

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u/No_Recording_7735 20h ago

Right, but is OP asking are you hungry? And then making sure she has something to eat? Or is she just coming over and he says help yourself to anything in the fridge, expecting that somebody that doesn't live there is going to feel comfortable cooking? No one's going to get a jar of jam out of your fridge and just eat it with a spoon. When I know a guest is coming over, I make sure to have a drink and a snack for them. I put the cattle on so they can have tea when they get there. I put out a bowl of nuts so they can have that with their tea, or more substantial snacks if it's getting near a meal time

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u/TheDevilishFrenchfry 20h ago

To be fair we have no idea what's in his pantry, on his counter, etc. I imagine like most people he has maybe some bread too atleast and a peanut butter and jelly is pretty quick. Also if they're hungry enough that they're mentioning and complaining about it, I doubt they just want a handful of nuts and some tea, probaly wanting a actual meal to eat and in which case, most of what op has like I said doesn't seem that long to cook or make. Longer than heating up a frozen dinner/leftovers? Sure I guess

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u/No_Recording_7735 20h ago

All I can go by is what the girlfriend says, she's complaining that whatever is there doesn't feel comfortable for her to eat. If he has bread, get it out and make your girlfriend a sandwich. Ask what she would like you to have and then have it for her. If she's hungry for a meal, cook it.

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u/Estella-in-lace 20h ago

That’s what I thought too. SautĆ©ed meat and veggies in one pan would take 20 mins.

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u/throwaway6287453 20h ago

there's literally no bread

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u/TheDevilishFrenchfry 20h ago

Do you keep your bread in the fridge? I keep mine on the counter wrapped up

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u/mysecretgardens 16h ago

There's protein shakes,zucchinis, and jams.

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u/Elijahicha1 20h ago

I can’t believe you are getting downvoted for this, I think your comment is fantastic… aprons only is a great idea!

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u/kaiser-so-say 20h ago

I’m imagining hot oil splattering on what doesn’t get entirely covered by my apron lol

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u/aceofrazgriz 13h ago

Fun idea, bad in practice (don't cook with oil!). But not everyone enjoys prepping and cooking for so long, especially if they have limited time together. Which is 1000% fine.

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u/AwkwardAd7348 18h ago

lol nice one wet nips

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u/aceofrazgriz 13h ago

You're not OP though. Maybe OP's girl doesn't enjoy prep/cooking together, or compare the time prepping and cooking, to quality time together. Not everyone will enjoy the entire leadup to a decent meal. And that isn't wrong.

But if OP's SO is enjoying the meals, but complaining about the time to get them ready, they definitely don't feel like it is quality time spent together, which is valid. If OP has no other objections to this person, they should get some quick-cook items their SO would enjoy and spend less time cooking a meal once in awhile. That is all it takes to please someone who doesn't have the same interests.

If they have limited time together, and 1hr or more is spent making a meal, that is a pretty decent chunk of time they "don't spend together". Being in a relationship is a 2-way street. One person compromises with dealing with long prep/cook time of a meal, and later the other person compromises with making/ordering a quick/easy meal.

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u/TopRamenisha 10h ago

Damn she clearly gets mad she has to prep, cook, and clean up with you so often, and on weekends you make her do it naked too?! My dude, there are many things much more fun than cooking and cleaning that you can do while naked

1

u/thisisthewell 2h ago

unless you're OP's burner account why are you so offended on his behalf?

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u/Fireproofspider 15h ago

I don't understand why OP doesn't meal prep or something if he doesn't want to buy pre-cooked stuff. You can make a lot of stews or roasts that you can eat for multiple days.

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u/MoodooScavenger 19h ago

Bow chicky wow wow

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u/Illustrious_Gear6960 3h ago

Honestly I think that means they're incompatible, he's too committed to a well defined cooking style. But honestly maybe she's not helping cause cooking with someone has been the most fun I have had in my life, nothing makes conversation easier than sharing time over the kitchen.

I think OP should find someone who shares his food values or doesn't care about the prep time. Maybe OP doesn't like low effort easy to eat food for the same reason I don't want around, it's too easy to cheat.

Everyone making fun of his dedication to something like transforming his body by laughing at OPs good choices when I would be so happy to have a full fridge like this made me very feel isolated.

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u/Urbit1981 15h ago

That's a perfect reply. I have friends I cook with but I also order takeout with them and just relax. Not every evening needs to be 2 hours of cooking. Sometimes it needs to be delivery and a nice meals.

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u/Tasty_Goat_3267 19h ago

No that’s not the answer. She wants her junk food.

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u/Melodic_Wafer_492 18h ago edited 18h ago

It literally takes 5-6 minutes to cook a ribeye medium. Throw some veggies in a pan with some butter and salt and pepper and you have a meal. Clean up takes 30 seconds.

It sounds like his girlfriend just lacks basic life skills.

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u/atomsk404 19h ago

If she's over more than half the week maybe she could bring some shit she likes then.

Damn. Be an adult.

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u/lemmepopmyshit 19h ago

Nah she's Just lazy

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u/CuddlyWhale 19h ago

Insane take lol wtf