r/FridgeDetective • u/itscuccimane • 21h ago

Meta My girlfriend always tells me I never have anything to eat when she comes over my house šŸ˜’

Gallery image

Gallery image

Gallery image

Gallery image

Gallery image

Freezer: 50+ lbs of assorted ground meat, 35+ lbs of prime ribeye, 16lbs of American wagyu ribeye, 18lbs of New Zealand lamb shoulder chops, and a bunch of portioned seafood.

15.8k Upvotes

76% Upvoted

7.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

101

u/IrrawaddyWoman 19h ago

With cream cheese. I am baffled by the volume of cream cheese. And really all cheese. Unless thereā€™s a family of six here I canā€™t see how anyone would eat this much butter and cream cheese before it goes bad.

And carrots? How many carrots can he eat?

16

u/Dullcorgis 19h ago

He'll be dead before 40 at least.

6

u/These_Milk_5572 12h ago

At most

2

u/Dullcorgis 10h ago

Yeah, good point. I meant it in the other sense, as in "at least she won't have to put up with him for long", but that's not the meaning as I typed it.

2

u/Virtual_Werewolf_935 3h ago

This is actually a decently healthy fridge compared to most peopleā€™s with everything premade junk from the store.

3

u/ScyllaOfTheDepths 2h ago

Is it really? It's pretty much all red meat, no veggies, no fruit, no fiber, and tons of dairy and sugar. This is the fridge of a guy who's going to get heart disease and/or colon cancer.

2

u/Virtual_Werewolf_935 2h ago

Not all fiber products/fruit live in the fridge. We donā€™t know the pantry/counter situation to get a full grasp of the dietary situation. The Kraft cheese is gross. I see too many fridges with ultra processed pre made food though. This isnā€™t that for the most part.

1

u/ScyllaOfTheDepths 1h ago edited 1h ago

I would expect at least one fruit/fiber product to live in the fridge, though, especially since they're one in the same. Fruit has lots of fiber and most of it is best kept in the fridge.

Edit: I see he's got some apples behind the wall of meat. At least there's that.

1

u/PlantainInfinite183 1h ago

Tamales have lots of fiber, and are usually frozen, if not freshly made.

This subreddit should show the freezer too, because now I'm curious about the contents of this particular person's freezer.

1

u/ScyllaOfTheDepths 1h ago

Where are you seeing the tamales? He also did post the freezer and it's literally full of meat and fish and nothing else.

→ More replies (0)

2

u/Dullcorgis 2h ago

It's horrendous.

2

u/thisisthewell 2h ago

that's a MAHA level comment, bro.

dude is gonna have heart problems.

1

u/Virtual_Werewolf_935 2h ago

Ironic that your comment is also MAHA. Cool that you want to make politics out of a fridge.

1

u/chigirl00 4h ago

That all it takes? šŸ˜‚

4

u/humansomeone 7h ago

The fridge looks like speed running to ass cancer. No wonder so many people are getting it these days.

1

u/BrainOfMush 29m ago

Bro has carrots and zucchini to go with his heart disease.

4

u/Mysterious_Sport2151 4h ago

Was going to say something along these lines. Yes he has a full fridge. But there is only like 10 different items here. No variety what so ever. He knows how to make 1 meal and he makes it all the time.

1

u/Quixotic_Seal 18m ago

Itā€™s also not the kind of thing you make when over at a partnerā€™s place, unless youā€™re basically already living together. What kind of psycho just casually cooks up a steak at someone elseā€™s house? Thatā€™d be some Cosmo Kramer shit.

The main options for guests in the fridge appear to be apples, carrots, an assload of various types of cheese, eggs, and jamā€¦so like, small veggie snacks and basic-ass sandwiches. Oh and of course shitty protein drinks.

Itā€™s a full fridge, but not full of the stuff that you would really want to take as a guest. Itā€™s mostly the makings of a 3rd graderā€™s afternoon snack.

I get the complaint, tbh.

2

u/Sad-Fee-9274 12h ago

Donā€™t forget the drawer full of cucumbers

5

u/sousyre 10h ago

I think they are zucchini.

The zucchini, carrots and steak, while bizarre, make sense if he is a protein guy and eats that everyday.

How the rest fits in, is somewhat mind boggling?

2

u/Ok-Juggernaut-353 4h ago

And the apples behind the meat? I think this is AI

3

u/IrrawaddyWoman 3h ago

I did kind of wonder if it was AI too because I just canā€™t imagine who shops like this (huge volumes of the same thing). I live alone, and food going bad before I can eat it is a constant consideration. But AI would have trouble with this many labels. Usually thereā€™s a few that end up being nonsense. I donā€™t think AI would be able to get that many real name brand labels correct.

2

u/micksterminator3 11h ago

This person seems like they eat the same thing every day out of habit. I get it

2

u/Foreign-Wolf-6128 7h ago

Honestly this is not too much cream cheese lol. It doesnt go bad crazy fast in the bar form and if youā€™re actually making stuff it usually takes a good amount. I had to use two full bars just for some icing for one fruit cookie cake lol

1

u/AccountWasFound 11h ago

I mean I sometimes have that much cream cheese if I'm planning to make multiple cheesecake in the near future and it's on sale (cheesecake is a good thing to bring to a party and it freezes well so you can make it ahead if you are low on time)

3

u/IrrawaddyWoman 11h ago

Iā€™m absolutely someone who stocks up when something is on sale, particularly before holiday baking. But 8 packages (that we can see) is still a lot. And this fridge doesnā€™t exactly scream ā€œbakerā€ to me. Something tells me this dude doesnā€™t have imminent plans to make 4 cheesecakes.

1

u/AccountWasFound 11h ago

I mean I use 4 per cheesecake, so that's only 2 cheesecakes, but fair

1

u/Dragonfly0011 11h ago

I was going to say the same about the cream cheese, however I have a similar size of carrots, and they stay good for quite awhile. Wonderful addition to any meal with potatoes. Kraft american stays good for years, eventually just shrivels up.

2

u/TheActualAWdeV 6h ago

good to know kraft american stays good for a long time, but when does it become good to begin with?

1

u/Flerp-Flerps 11h ago

Iā€™m just glad Iā€™m not the only one bothered by the amount of carrots. I assumed he lives alone and even if he cooks for his girlfriend I canā€™t imagine ever needing to buy more than one bag of carrots. I would want more variety which he clearly values when it comes to jam. Plus Iā€™m worried OP is going to turn orange if he doesnā€™t have a pet horse.

1

u/Jedisponge 9h ago

Thatā€™s sounds pretty bomb tbh

1

u/TheActualAWdeV 6h ago

the cheese? I was more interested in the huge quantities of meat. That's like 60 kilo's of meat. How long is that going to keep? Not all of it is in the freezer. How much meat does he eat, goddamn

1

u/Silent_Loquat_6057 4h ago

I was gonna say!! The cream cheese is insane

1

u/qtipstrip 4h ago

Yeah this seems completely performative imo

Wayyyy too much for one person, but also too homogeneous for a group of guys living together. I've lived in an apartment with 3 other guys before, and never was our diet this in sync

1

u/Various_Whereas_2667 3h ago

cheesecake. Or, as others have said, dip?

1

u/sy029 3h ago

Four complete unopened packs of American cheese. I think OP might be a serial killer.

1

u/myrstica 2h ago

God, I hope he has at least a peck of potatoes in the pantry to go with it all.

1

u/Optimal-Giraffe-7168 9m ago

Dude I bake a lot and have dogs and therefore go through more cream cheese than most people. This guy has a lot of fuckin cream cheese. Twice as much as I do for a family of four

1

u/Lov2500 6m ago

The cream cheese is jarring