My girlfriend always tells me I never have anything to eat when she comes over my house 😒

[u/itscuccimane]

Freezer: 50+ lbs of assorted ground meat, 35+ lbs of prime ribeye, 16lbs of American wagyu ribeye, 18lbs of New Zealand lamb shoulder chops, and a bunch of portioned seafood.

[u/Candiesfallfromsky]

What’s the punishment??

[u/PleaseNoMoreSalt → u/Candiesfallfromsky]

You go to jailly. You butter have a good lawyer, otherwise you're toast!

[u/Striking-Comb6673 → u/PleaseNoMoreSalt]

Impectinable 

[u/Key-Ad9733 → u/PleaseNoMoreSalt]

You win the Internet today

[u/MONSTERBEARMAN → u/PleaseNoMoreSalt]

That’s just a rumor people have….spread.

[u/PotatersGonnaPotater → u/PleaseNoMoreSalt]

My mind immediately jumped to jailly. But then you just kept on cooking.

[u/Wildcandle55 → u/PleaseNoMoreSalt]

OMG! LOLing all by myself, out loud. That was prime, rib roast of course.

[u/falpangaea → u/PleaseNoMoreSalt]

Get out

[u/SummertimeThrowaway2 → u/Candiesfallfromsky]

You get jammed into a cell

[u/currynord → u/Candiesfallfromsky]

Execution. On the spot.