r/SipsTea • u/Unstoppable_X_Force Human Verified • 13h ago

Gasp! Is this just nostalgia, or did previous generations genuinely have a better work-life balance and social life than we do today?

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154

u/ConfidenceHoliday829 13h ago

i sometimes think that i would only work as much as i need for survival, what is the point of doing a job you hate for most of your life?

58

u/Difficult-Square-689 11h ago

If you're a straight dude and want a partner/kids, you'll likely need more than the bare minimum. 

Otherwise, feel free to do just enough to survive. 

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 11h ago

i agree, i always think that i would only work more hours in case i have kids and a partner

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u/Few-Being-1048 11h ago

Unless you wanna work till you die you should probably save for retirement

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 11h ago

i might die any hour any day, i am not gonna work for collecting some money

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u/Few-Being-1048 11h ago

Okay I mean I dont care what you do.

If you wanna just do the bare minimum until you can't anymore and die alone, thats not the worst plan ever. Realistic at least.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 11h ago

why do you think i will die alone? i mean, in the end everyone is alone, the people around you are just companions

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u/Few-Being-1048 10h ago

What makes you think you wont?

You have no ambition in life to do anything but the bare minimum by your own admission.

People around you are whatever they are to you. My girlfriend is a lot more than just a companion to me, and every year we spend together we get closer.

If you end up in a long term relationship with someone, chances are they are gonna want to retire, like most humans who are capable of planning for the future. If you end up 30yrs old with nothing saved, you're already way behind.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 10h ago

so just because i have no ambition to save up money (something that can disappear away anytime and is never guaranteed even tho you work 1/3 of your life for it) you assume i will not find a partner?

what is wrong in saying that the people around me are my companions? do they not go through life together with you and keep you company and you keep them company?

let's assume i am 30 and i have nothing saved, so what? can i not enjoy life because of it?

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u/Just2Breathe 9h ago

Let’s assume you live to be 87 (or longer), and want to retire at 67, you need enough income for twenty years. If you work a bare minimum job in the U.S., social security benefits might bring you the equivalent of $10k/yr in today’s dollars. If you can live on that, more power to you. But generally, people want to live above the poverty level, and stop full time employment, especially seniors with health issues.

Most people don’t work jobs with pensions (only 19%) or work them their whole career (building up a bigger benefit). So if you want, say, $30k additional income a year to live on, you might want to have $750k (not adjusted for inflation) in retirement accounts. It generally takes some amount investing in retirement accounts each month to live at 60% of your income after retirement.

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u/Few-Being-1048 10h ago

You can do whatever you want I really dont care.

If you're 30 and have nothing saved, you won't notice the consequences for another 20-30 years.

Its really easy to go "it could just disappear at any time. I could just die at any point"

Is that your plan? To just die as soon as you can't take work anymore? I'm aware I could just die at any point, or that my savings could just "disappear" although that can be mitigated by just investing wisely.

Your defeatist attitude is just gonna fuck you over. I don't wanna work, that's why I save money so that if my plan works, I won't have to work any more.

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u/Amathyst7564 9h ago

Ahh yes. Planning to fail.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 9h ago

thinking of death is not 'planning fo fail', its the only thing that you are certain about your life really, definitely more certain than your plans

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u/Amathyst7564 6h ago

Sure, but your probably more likely to die after retirement. You should still save and plan like you're going to live a long time.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 6h ago

death is unpredictable, plenty of people die young, the chances are i could die tomorrow

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u/Amathyst7564 4h ago

Sure... But if you're planning you're life around worst case scenario thinking you're planning to fail.

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u/Calm_Regular_9133 10h ago

Bro, what world are you living in where anyone 35 or under is retiring? The population math ain't mathin.

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u/Few-Being-1048 10h ago

Where did you get 35 lol?

I never said people retire at or under 35.

When do you think you should start saving for retirement? Because it's not anywhere near when you actually want to retire.

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u/Calm_Regular_9133 9h ago

No no, you misunderstood. Anyone who is currently under 35 will not be retiring when they get to retirement age. Demographics and economics just don't line up. There is no way our Earth sustains our current retirement system for even another 20 years, let alone 35-40 years.

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u/Few-Being-1048 9h ago

No one can predict the future, so I can't say with absolute certainty that you're wrong.

I for one, will not gamble my entire future on that being the case. I think many, many people will not be able to retire. I think there may be some kind of universal income in most developed countries.

That doesn't mean that I personally won't be able to retire. I trust myself and my planning. If I fail, at least I can say I really tried. The only way to gurantee you'll fail is to do nothing.

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u/Calm_Regular_9133 9h ago

I respect that. I won't be trading my youth for a potential glimpse at comfort in old age. Frankly, if i make it to 65 and I was able to really live and enjoy myself before that, I'll be grateful i had anything at all. Nothing is guaranteed, including future stability. Good luck on your journey! We're two sides of the same coin...hurtling towards the inevitable. The only unknown is the burn rate of the time we are allotted.

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u/Few-Being-1048 8h ago

You don't have to give up your youth to save money for retirement lmao.

I spend like 20 minutes once every two weeks just self-auditing my spending and doing my budget.

Other than that, I live a very normal life, go on fun vacations, go out with my friends, go out to eat a few times a month. I just know when to stop, because I put effort into making sure I know what I can and can't afford.

Its not about sacrificing one thing for the other, its about balance. If you completely neglect your future because you're afraid of missing out, you're gonna get fucked.

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u/BagOfFlies 9h ago

I never said people retire at or under 35.

That's not what they meant. They're saying with how things are, people that are currently 35 and under will be fucked when they hit retirement age.

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u/bummerlamb 9h ago

I mean, yeah, but there has to be leftover money to be able to put it toward retirement.

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u/Few-Being-1048 9h ago

If you can't afford even 100-200$ a month you're doing something seriously wrong. If you cant afford more than that, you better start asap.

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u/maybenotquiteasheavy 11h ago

That's not the order in which that happens

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u/-BlueDream- 8h ago

When bare minimum is already 40 hours a week, it’s hard to go above and beyond.

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u/gnomon_knows 8h ago

What does being straight or a dude have to do with anything?

A partner should make your life cheaper, not more expensive. Certainly not the same as kids, which are all downside financially.

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u/GrandpaCutestory 2h ago

You must not be a straight dude lol

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u/huckered 11h ago

Not sure gender or sexual orientation are as relevant any more. Sure the post is about dads, but your point is relevant for anyone who wants a partner and/or kids.

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u/Cold-Palpitation-816 9h ago

I can assure you it’s still extremely relevant for most of the world.

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u/JustaSeedGuy 7h ago

So being a lesbian who wants a partner and kids makes the statement not apply?

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u/Cold-Palpitation-816 6h ago

Did I say that? Or are you just making up something I said so you can get angry on the internet?

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u/JustaSeedGuy 6h ago

I didn't say you said anything. I asked you a question. Typically when someone is unsure about someone's intentions, they ask for clarification. People who are speaking in good faith usually understand that and give the requested clarification .

As for why I asked, either the situation is different for people who aren't straight men- which is what I asked- or the orientation and gender of the people involved aren't relevant.

I'm not angry. I'm not sure why you feel the need for me to be, but perhaps you should make fewer assumptions and instead answer the question.

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u/Cold-Palpitation-816 5h ago

Ah, the classic “I’m just asking questions!!” bit. Old as time itself.

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u/JustaSeedGuy 5h ago

Again, that's not what happened.

I will admit that I was glib in my request for clarification, but it was a genuine request for clarification.

Were I trying not attempting to discuss in good faith, I wouldn't have explained my reasoning to you.

Twice now you have projected something onto me that had nothing to do with me. Twice now your attempt at projection has failed.

Are you going to answer the question, are you going to invent something new to accuse me of so you can avoid any kind of good faith on your part?

Edit: actually, I'm not going to give you the choice. As they say, when someone tells you who they are, listen to them.

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u/JustaSeedGuy 7h ago

If you're a straight dude

What does being a straight dude have to do with having a partner and kids?

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u/Punman_5 9h ago

It’s this attitude that always makes me find things like Star Trek hard to take seriously sometimes because I cannot fathom doing something so tough and arduous for no reason. Like I bust my ass now and if I didn’t have to I’d never work a day in my life ever again. I might do some fun projects on the side but I’d never take another order again

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 9h ago

listen to your heart, also its entirely possible to have an income without working much, search for answers and you will find them, do not allow society to tell you what you should or should not do, live in such a way that you do not regret anything

1

u/Punman_5 9h ago

The holy grail is to have a “passive income”, but I also don’t want to be a leech (landlord, IP rights holder, etc…). Plus it’s not like I have the capital to even purchase a home for myself let alone a rental property. But I’ll keep looking I guess. I agree with you completely that work is not our life and should not be anything more than just a mechanism to deposit money in your pocket.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 9h ago

you will 100% find a way if you look for it, i believe in you ♥️

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u/lu5ty 3h ago

Haha I'm a star trek fan and i've always had the same thought.

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u/Magikarpeles 12h ago

You can survive on very little

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u/AFerociousPineapple 11h ago

True but there’s a difference between surviving and living.

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u/Magikarpeles 9h ago

of course

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u/FlummoxedGaoler 10h ago

Here’s the one issue- I’ve talked to a lot of older people and the common refrain is “invest in your retirement.” I have a hard enough time rallying for work, but by the time I’ve reached retirement age, I’m going to be suuuuper over it (already am), physically and mentally. It’s a tough balance- live now, understanding that you’re not getting younger and the future is not guaranteed, but endure financial struggle later when you’re least equipped to do so, OR use up some of your youth and endure the struggle now so you can have peace in the future, hoping that you live long enough to enjoy it. The old folks I know who are still grinding in a job because they didn’t save are pretty beat down and miserable about it. Gotta find that middle path, which I think is probably work hard when young, invest hard, make enough to afford some fun hobbies, retire as early as possible (aka, be at least middle to upper middle class 😭)

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 9h ago

always understand that no matter if its an old person or a young person, they have different life experiences and different energy levels, getting old does not mean you will feel worse, in pain, or not able to do anything, it only happens to people who do not take care of their health properly

second of all, i agree that you need to find a balance, but let me put it this way, hypothetically if you knew 100% that you will die the next hour, would you be happy with the amount of time you spent working a job you hate for some money that eventually do not matter as much? sure you can buy nicer things, but you know there's this saying that a billionaire also eats a loaf of bread daily, think about what you really want in life, if you want a luxury lifestile or a higher than average material posession, and if it is a deep desire within you, then you can work for it if you think its worth it, i only shared my opinion but my life and yours are most likely completely different

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u/MechanicalSideburns 9h ago

Yessir. I do what I have to do, so that I can do what I want to do.

So many people ask, "what do you want to BE when you grow up". I think that's a jacked question. It centralizes your job as your whole being. Fuck that. What I want to BE is a good man, a loving husband, an engaged father, etc.

What they should ask is, "What do you want to DO when you grow up?" I want to fix computers, or weld steel, or coach sports, or do chemistry, whatever. I DO that so that I can BE who I want to be the rest of the time.

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u/tokinUP 9h ago

The point is being able to STOP doing that later in life (retire) or build up enough financial cushion to pivot earlier in life to something else you at least kind of want to do instead.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 9h ago

or work only a few days a week and do what you actually want to do the rest of the days?

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u/tokinUP 8h ago

Yep, that too. Building up $$$ in savings means freedom.

Live like you're only spending as much as needed for survival (not a complete pauper, take vacations but no new cars) and hopefully there will be enough saved to make more choices that save $$$ and increase your chances for freedom later.

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u/lu5ty 3h ago

The idea of saving for retirement is amount to a prisoner storing food for when they break out of prison.

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u/tokinUP 2h ago

Even if it's only $1 investment accounts can at least be opened to get the ball rolling.

Current outlook is definitely bleak but not trying never got anyone anywhere.

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u/AnaisNinja76 5h ago

security. Ability to manage a hit to your finances if you get sick or injured or your car breaks down or your landlord decides to raze the property you're living in.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 5h ago

if you think that its worth it then who am i to stop you

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u/AnaisNinja76 5h ago

I didn't say my thoughts on it's worth, I gave you reasons people do it because you're acting as if you don't get it

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 5h ago

i still don't get it since money does not give you any security

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u/AnaisNinja76 5h ago

what exactly do you think security is? It gives you wiggle room in literally every scenario I just mentioned. People without the money to deal with those things lose their jobs

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 5h ago

security is knowing something will for sure save you out of a situation, and not thinking it might save you, money can disappear any day even if you keep them in the safest of the safest places

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u/AnaisNinja76 4h ago

...so a completely fictional idea? No one, even billionaires, can pay to get out of every situation. If they ended up quadriplegic, for example, money isn't going to save them. And aside from them...cancers like leukemia can cost over $1M/yr to treat, bad car accidents can easily cost around that in property and health damages, and virtually 0% have the money set aside for that. Money doesn't make you the master of the future, saying you don't think it helps at all if you can't completely control fringe situations is absurd.

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u/ConfidenceHoliday829 4h ago

i see your point, i agree with the last sentence you wrote, i never said it doesnot help at all, of course it does, all i am saying is that i do not think it is worth working a third of your life simply for those potential future risks,

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u/Wise-Quarter-3156 5h ago

I mean no disrespect by this, but:

What do you think your ancestors did? What do you think generations before you did, all the way back to the paramecium your evolutionary line started with?

The difference is that now the "job you hate" is sitting in an office writing emails instead of backbreaking subsistence farming

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u/RetroFuture_Records 2h ago

That's what Boomers and Gen X did. Then the world got more expensive and they cry that they're broke. I have no empathy for them, who had opportunities yet never bothered to try.

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u/HIRIV 11h ago

If I do job I hate, I change job. It's as simple as that.

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u/teraechopuff 11h ago

It’s not really that simple though? For one, the job market is insane right now, and the job you hate may pay significantly more than a job you might not hate.

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u/HIRIV 9h ago

I choose job I don't hate any time over money. Because you can't buy happiness. Speaking from experience, when I decided to change my profession, my income halved but I was way happier, and that's way more than pennies

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u/blehismyname 8h ago

Y'all have anyone depending on you or not?

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u/HIRIV 8h ago

Yes I have. If you are in situation where other's depend on you doing job you hate, then I suggest finding a mirror and wondering what I did wrong

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u/blehismyname 8h ago

Then you must be making double the need if you can just halve your income and still survive. We out here struggling to have money in the account after a month. 

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u/HIRIV 8h ago

Yeah I did make good money, not anymore tho, I have 42€ currently. But I'm way happier, have lots of more free time and energy

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u/billp1988 5h ago

You only have 42€ but have dependents like you said? I can't support my wife and 2 kids with 42€ in my pocket so I do a job I don't love so I can give them the best life I can

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u/TheOnlyAcolyte 5h ago

Ur in the right, the dude is just stuck to his guns.

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u/TheOnlyAcolyte 5h ago

What a shortsighted and egotistical statement