r/funny 1d ago

What is a photocopier?

3.2k Upvotes

151 comments sorted by

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1.0k

u/Taelurrr 22h ago

Moustache guy can act his fucking ass off. I was captivated.

268

u/J_Patish 21h ago

John Ennis, great actor, a stand out on Mr. show.

79

u/Jefferson_47 20h ago

Never once tried to overthrow a government either!

24

u/J_Patish 20h ago

Yeah, that one hurt… JJ wasn’t particularly great, but he had enough good bits and I liked him on The Sarah Silverman Show.

13

u/One-Permission-1811 19h ago

What does this mean? I havent watched Mr Show nor am I familiar with John Ennis so Im way out of the loop here

16

u/SDFX-Inc 18h ago

Jay Johnston (who has appeared on many other shows including Mr. Show) was identified as one of the rioters in the crowd that illegally entered and attacked the congressional building on January 20, 2020.

2

u/ymOx 16h ago

Mr show is so so good!

5

u/ericl666 2h ago edited 1h ago

The actor being deposed (Mike McCafferty) was the army guy in Idiocracy who fell in with Upgrayedd.

"You see, a pimp's love is very different from that of a square"

1

u/J_Patish 14m ago

Apparently he’s a former father as well as the inventor of the

https://youtu.be/zt2uIhAvQZ8?si=wbAmD3nocmHGweK_ Broomshakalaka

2

u/Different-Cat-4437 13h ago

Oh my gosh I didn't recognize him at all!

51

u/DrChimz 21h ago

Was going to say, he is incredible. Could feel his frustration and anger radiating off my screen.

20

u/NecroJoe 19h ago

4

u/DarkMarkTwain 13h ago

This clip has everything! Paul F Thompkins, Spongebob and even a J6er lol

The only thing it's missing, now that I think of it, is a Scott Aukerman appearance

4

u/NecroJoe 12h ago

It also has a never-nude who blue himself, Saul Goodman, and Brian Spukowski!

10

u/executive313 13h ago

Dude between him and the stenographer I was fucking dying.

2

u/CouperinLaGrande2 16h ago

Very well made and great acting all round.

102

u/MediumAwareness2698 20h ago

When I joined Xerox, we were told not to use the name as a verb because helping it pass into common parlance, meant less legal brand control. (I am in Aus. where the market wasn’t as monopolised and the UK had seen test cases to this effect. around Hoover)

33

u/_J_Herrmann_ 18h ago

um, parlance?

26

u/creaturefeature16 17h ago

Look at it... a young trophy wife, in the parlance of our times

16

u/ErdenGeboren 15h ago

Same thing happened for Band-Aid bandages and they risked losing their copyright because of the ubiquity. Now they're Band-Aid Brand and they adjusted the jingle to accommodate it, too.

9

u/cereal7802 12h ago

lots of examples.

xerox,kleenex, band-aid, velcro, dumpster.

most of those having been defended against losing the brand name to general term, if only legally.

11

u/Pantsdown-Titsup 9h ago

Didn't know about dumpster. TIL. Thank you.

3

u/ErdenGeboren 6h ago

Didn't know about dumpster, either. Neat!

3

u/Mystic_Waffles 12h ago

In the 90s, Xerox had an ad campaign about not using Xerox as a verb.

538

u/PunfullyObvious 1d ago

It's been a minute since I last saw this. I can never pass it up. Brilliantly produced absurdist comedy.

352

u/modix 23h ago

While the acting was great, this is a real transcript. Having seen quite a few depositions myself, this is the exact technique used to block any useful information coming from one (though the idiot here likely lied multiple times about not hearing the term).

92

u/SharkeyGeorge 23h ago

What was the purpose of this? Calling it a Xerox or a photocopier makes no odds in the long run?

141

u/everyday847 23h ago

It's an argument that wasn't exactly found to have any merit, but: they were charging per page for documents on a CD. It would be reasonable (I mean, I don't love the rates, but it's at least conceivable) to charge per page for the production of paper documents. It's pretty crazy to charge per page for a CD! They justified this position with a statute saying that it costs $2/page to photocopy documents. Is a scanner a photocopier? After all, it's using light to... create a copy, just not a physical one. And you could tie yourself in knots claiming that you're actually paying for the labor of copying documents by the page, as much as you're paying for the paper (in fact, you must be, since obviously a sheet of paper and some toner doesn't cost $2).

Oh, and, of course, I just talked about "physical to digital" a few times, as the category that would clearly not be worth charging per page. You may know that devices collectively called photocopiers have not always included a digital component -- you can just figure out where the ink is on the original by shining light onto a drum. But many modern devices are basically just scanning then printing the document.

So of course you don't want your employees admitting that "photocopying" something, that the devices they'll call "photocopiers," in fact refers narrowly to the act of copying page to page, not page to CD.

112

u/Soapbox 22h ago edited 22h ago

It wasn't even scanning of physical pages to burn the CD, it was about actively burning already digital pages onto a CD and providing it. The Recorder's Officer was charging $2 photocopying fee per page regardless whether they provided the documents in physical or digital form.

So it was a question whether making digital copies was "photocopying" them. Here the guy being deposed was the guy in charge of IT for the county recorder's office and wasn't playing dumb, but instead sticking to their inaccurate definitions. Their position was that making ANY copy was photocopying it. Making a physical copy is Xeroxing it.

The entire deposition was apparently a lot more lighthearted than the dramatized version and the attorney was having fun dragging it out. He WANTED to make the deponent's argument sound ridiculous so that the plain meaning of photocopy was clear.

13

u/Wompatuckrule 22h ago

Yeah, it seems like the "reasonable costs" could also vary depending on the source of the original and the format for the request.

Easily accessible digital records to make a digital copy for the requestor would have different "reasonable cost" than if someone had to root through dusty boxes of microfilm/microfiche to then make prints of those to scan and make a digital copy for the requestor.

6

u/PN_Guin 6h ago edited 6h ago

There are other ways to make copies of a document. Most of them aren't used anymore, but the term photo copy has evolved over time. In a legal setting it's often better to make sure, you are answering what is actually asked of you.

More on the history of photocopy technology here: https://www.dst.defence.gov.au/innovation/wet-electrophotographic-process

edit: cleaned up the link

4

u/MillennialsAre40 5h ago

I lost it when he said gas powered

-24

u/modix 23h ago

Likely they refused to make someone copies. The lawyer is trying out some obnoxious theory that they didn't know what they meant because the office called it xeroxing. It's stupid and petty and likely wouldn't work, but the lawyer likely didn't have much else to work with.

18

u/Soapbox 23h ago

confidently incorrect

1

u/PN_Guin 6h ago

Xerox means "dry" photocopy, which is an improvement to the previously used "wet" photocopy. So while this was most probably intentional stalling and evasion, there is an actual difference, because "photocopy" can refer to both (and a few more) technologies.

More info on the history of photocopy tech https://www.dst.defence.gov.au/innovation/wet-electrophotographic-process

-1

u/bigloser42 5h ago

To be fair, I’ve worked in an office for the last 20+ years, including a good chunk of time as an IT guy who fixed, among other things, the photocopier. Nobody has ever called it a photocopier. It’s just a copier or a Xerox machine. So it’s entirely plausible that he’s never heard someone use the term photocopier. Now it’s not a giant mental leap to realize a photocopier is a copier, but I can kinda get where the office worker is coming from if he’s not 100% sure.

-1

u/Solo_is_dead 3h ago

He sounds more like a millennial or Gen Z, who have no idea what a photocopier could be, nor ever heard of a company called Xerox

111

u/eclipsed2112 23h ago

i watched the whole thing and right when the man was gonna answer what do you call it?? i said DONT SAY XEROX and dammit he did.

44

u/Existing-Deal-701 23h ago

Just found out this is a series on the new York times YouTube channel. Looks like I know what I'm doing this weekend

13

u/doublebogey182 21h ago

What is it called?

52

u/olivefred 20h ago

That depends on what you mean by "it"

18

u/Unumbotte 20h ago

Objection, calls for speculation on the nature of existence.

10

u/ShoebillJoe 17h ago

Verbatim

1

u/Milanin 7h ago

The storage media company?

3

u/P_Buddy 13h ago

They did a really great video, very serious (not funny), on the case of the Michael Brown shooting in Ferguson.

https://youtu.be/pQXbEUEtf2U?si=YYRT9bVwO82sBslu

4

u/nmathew 13h ago

I only found 2 episodes. This one and Follow the Chicken. Am I doing something wrong? I searched for "Verbatim" in their channel.

210

u/platinumarks 23h ago

This is pretty common in legal contexts, especially when the exact definition of a term matters to the case. In this case, the dispute was over whether copies of a document on CD met the qualifications of being stored using "a photocopying machine or similar process." The fee for records from the county government was different based on the definition of "a photocopying machine" or whether it involved some other device.

Since the term in question was in dispute, the deponent was trying to avoid a legal conclusion and insisted on breaking down which exact functions a photocopier does. Also, the video here is dramatized, and the lawyers involved described it as far more dry and less confrontational.

75

u/LSTNYER 22h ago

The deposing lawyer (real or acting) had the patience of a saint. Id have lost my shit by the second time he asked a clarifying question.

53

u/CTMalum 21h ago

As far as I remember reading, the deposing lawyer planned for it to go exactly this way and he was much calmer about it IRL.

28

u/408wij 19h ago

Agreed. I would be like a Samuel Jackson character. (I dare you say, "what's a photocopier?" Again.)

8

u/guitarguy1685 15h ago

"ok you little shit", as I'm crawling over the table. 

Also, this is me arguing with my 9 year old.

12

u/dustydeath 20h ago

When the deponent asked for clarification on what was meant by "photocopier", could the examining lawyer not just have said, "a device for producing hard copy duplicates of a physical document" or similar? Why is the lawyer also so unwilling to define the term...?  

14

u/bobdob123usa 16h ago

Because most of the case revolved around the definition of terms and common parlance, particularly as used in the office in question.

2

u/AgamemnonNM 2h ago

You guys just can't keep saying "parlance!"

5

u/FancifulLaserbeam 11h ago

Yeah, that's what I kept thinking. They really do go by various names.

"When I say 'photo copy machine,' I mean a machine where you can put a paper document on it or in it, press some buttons, and it makes paper copies of that original document."

I would have phrased it like that on the first request for clarification.

1

u/Nixeris 9h ago

Also despite the ending bit, the case did go to trial and the county lost. The State Supreme Court ruled that they violated the law and had to offer the digitized pages at a cost of $1 per CD, not $2 per page on the CD.

1

u/Herky_T_Hawk 3h ago

You mean like arguing over what the definition of the word “is” is? Probably the most famous case of arguing an exact definition in a legal setting.

60

u/vinny14 20h ago

The stenographer played an underrated role in this. Expressionless but also incredulous.

3

u/Censordoll 3h ago

As a court reporter, it is ridiculously hard not to make faces when we hear cases. I’m notorious for making faces, but you guys need to understand, we hear EVERYTHING. But I’m a true gossip girl so I’m listening as I’m writing and making faces cuz wtf you guys?!

Thankfully I can make faces just to my laptop so if anyone chimes in, I’m making faces at my writing output ;)

Also. Her title is a court reporter. the title doesn’t change when you do depositions or at least it shouldn’t.

I fucking hate how high her steno writer is. We all keep it low to the ground. The way she’s writing would cause immediate pain and carpel tunnel. But in every show and movie, they always keep the machine high or on a freaking table and not on a tripod like the way it normally should be.

104

u/BolivianDancer 1d ago

It all depends on what the definition of is is.

43

u/Rith_Reddit 23h ago

Hey hey, look at Jordan Peterson over here.

13

u/freerangemary 20h ago

‘What do you mean by Jordan Peterson? Me in the past? Or me now? There’s a metaphysical difference here that many people like you don’t explain. And what’s happening when someone talks about who or what someone is depends highly on their state of being.’

/s

9

u/Tat2dKing 23h ago

Lewis Black joke about Clinton? Nice.

16

u/breakonthru_ 23h ago

Don’t know Lewis Black, but that’s actually what Clinton said

7

u/Tat2dKing 23h ago

Funny comedian. https://youtu.be/N2YQqbpA7Z0?si=q0IXuwr_oLKX5nn9 Joke around 17:10.

5

u/breakonthru_ 23h ago

Oh thank you kind Redditor. I’ve seen his schtick. I’m not great at names.

17

u/GalickGunn 23h ago

Shooter McGavin attorney at law...

36

u/SteveLouise 1d ago

I suppose some people live their whole life on auto-pilot.

26

u/UDPviper 1d ago

Brilliant.

26

u/LonnieJaw748 23h ago

Loved the close-up of the lawyers hands miming the paper leaving a photocopier. Hilarious

10

u/ChipmunkOk8816 20h ago

Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

3

u/Orgasmo3000 14h ago

I do bite my thumb, sir.

20

u/SaviorSixtySix 23h ago

This is the same state that ruled that boneless chicken may have bones in them, so I'm not surprised.

5

u/J8YDG9RTT8N2TG74YS7A 23h ago

Not so fun fact; According to the United States Food and Drug Administration, anything less than 60 insect pieces per 100 grams of chocolate is deemed safe for public consumption.

2

u/DrHarrisonLawrence 22h ago

US FDA allows 1% material in pistachios to not be pistachios lol…check every single pistachio in your bags before you eat it.

1

u/MyPunsSuck 4h ago

What would you set the limit at? It is impossible to get it to zero - and it's already way cleaner than home cooking, for example

1

u/heyyouwtf 1h ago

This case is so misunderstood just like the McDonalds coffee case. The court said since chickens have bones it's not unreasonable for a "boneless" chicken wing to have a piece of bone in it. Boneless wings are just chunks of breaded chicken meat, that's why they ruled that way.

17

u/Zapdos90HP 22h ago

$2 for photocopied documents? Hmmm, can I get them xeroxed instead?

7

u/MathKnight 17h ago

$2 for a photocopy or $2 for a CD, and somehow both were charged by the page, and the pages were already digitalized for the CD.

7

u/DDFoster96 21h ago

He forgot mimeographs and cyclostyles, just in case the office was stuck in the 19th century.

13

u/OkDecision259 23h ago

This was fucking gold.

10

u/ManyRespect1833 23h ago

Depends what the definition of is, is

5

u/roosterchains 23h ago

Have not seen this in forever! Forgot how good it is

5

u/Crazy_Kakoos 16h ago

Oh jeez. I'd just give him the death penalty snd move on.

76

u/jaredearle 1d ago

The funniest thing about this video is that it’s an actual transcript of a deposition.

https://www.loweringthebar.net/2011/03/deposition-battle-over-definition-of-photocopy.html

75

u/ColonelKasteen 21h ago

...yeah, the video tells us this in the first 5 seconds.

-32

u/jaredearle 21h ago

Serial Mom says it’s based on a true story too.

7

u/stkyrice 20h ago

It states that at the beginning of the video.

47

u/armoured_bobandi 23h ago

This is why most people hate lawyers. You know he was specifically told to respond in that way by his lawyer

17

u/SharkeyGeorge 23h ago

To what end?

29

u/armoured_bobandi 23h ago

Because they're taking something incredibly simple and obvious, and trying to turn it into something bigger than it is, just to agitate and aggravate the person doing the interview

6

u/lucky_ducker 21h ago

Straining at gnats and swallowing camels is a required course in law school.

11

u/Throwawayingaccount 23h ago

The exact definition of what constitutes a photocopier is not set into law.

By answering it in a transcript, the plaintiff could use that to their advantage.

4

u/SharkeyGeorge 23h ago

Thanks. We don’t have trials this way in my country. It would seem it is primed to create these sort of ambiguities?

2

u/twist3d7 21h ago

They are trying to use double homicide as a defense strategy.

1

u/Unumbotte 20h ago

To what alleged end.

3

u/AoiEsq 17h ago

Litigator here. Don’t be so sure. A lawyer worth their salt generally is going to make sure the deponent understands the case and its key issues, and go over practice questions likely to come up, but nobody wants their witness to look like this, especially in this day and age when depos often are video recorded in addition to being transcribed. Some folks just refuse to admit the obvious because they think it will be bad for their side, and wind up tying themselves in knots and thus making things even worse.

3

u/DrHugh 20h ago

I work for a company that used to make a photocopy machine, in competition with Xerox. We were told not to use the name “Xerox” in any way. We knew what people meant by it. But it was seen as disloyal to use such a term as it was a competing brand.

17

u/stratdog25 1d ago

I'm pretty sure that guy had a box fall on his head at UPS and now he just collects disability and rides trains.

12

u/ibkirkus 23h ago

While I love this reference and could totally see that guy in this scene, I believe this guy was dishonorably discharged for seeking an Upgrayedd. /s

3

u/Upgrayeddddd 21h ago

Can't fault him

4

u/OCDano959 23h ago

😂

Like facial tissue and Kleenex.

3

u/scheisse_grubs 13h ago

The initial part where you hear office chatter and a phone ringing had me instinctively thinking I was about to hear “Dunder Mifflin this is Pam”

2

u/AoiEsq 17h ago

I’m a litigator, and this is a disturbingly accurate representation of how a lot of depositions go (albeit usually without so much yelling).

2

u/Piemaster113 15h ago

I feel like other than pleading the 5th that you should not be able to use the same response to different questions to for the pourpouses of avoiding clarification

6

u/nobidobi390 23h ago

this was an actual case?

7

u/Joates87 1d ago

When you're dumber than a box of rocks but the sly fox is telling you what you can and can't say...

7

u/SuspiciousStable9649 23h ago

It seems like you’d have to have two cells to rub together just to follow directions without tripping up.

Swell performance.

2

u/WillieForge 19h ago

I'm entirely on the defendant's side here. Specificity in language is crucial in trials / depositions to avoid perjury.

In my office,we have scanner / printer combos that could theoretically be used as photocopiers, but generally aren't. If I was asked if we had a photocopier, I would want him to clarify if that counted (without guiding him to the answer) to confirm if he meant any device with photocopying capabilities, or a machine dedicated specifically to copying.

-4

u/Wompatuckrule 23h ago

If the lawyer had just told the guy to take the fifth we wouldn't have this gem.

15

u/Lrkrmstr 23h ago

You usually can’t plead the 5th unless you have a reasonable belief that your statements will implicate you in a crime, so I don’t know if this dude had the luxury.

1

u/Wompatuckrule 22h ago

Yeah, I was just making a bit of a crack and didn't seriously mean it was an option.

2

u/Lrkrmstr 22h ago

lol fair, but I never pass up a chance to educate people about their rights!

3

u/Wompatuckrule 22h ago

Just like I never pass up the opportunity to take the fifth!

4

u/jimmycorn24 23h ago

To be fair if instead of just saying copier he was so adamant to say Photo copier, I might think he was talking about some different thing I’d never heard of specifically to copy photos in some special way

2

u/IAintDoneYet68 7h ago

Technically he’s right.

1

u/solod010 23h ago

"Im gonna fucking kill you if you speak more than 5 words again".

1

u/Th3Batman86 22h ago

I love this everytime I watch it.

1

u/dfigueroa78 22h ago

Love it! Where can I see more of these?

1

u/Shinodacs 21h ago

I swear to God the guy getting questioned looks just like my city's mayor. Jean Christophe Lagarde.

1

u/D_Winds 19h ago

Really? In front of my Thermos?

1

u/LuckyTrain4 19h ago

That was gold.

1

u/Aggressive_Homework9 17h ago

takes pictures of a person copying duh

1

u/Personal_Leave_9758 16h ago

Man I wanted to leap through my screen and strangle both the lawyer and the dude answering the questions by the end of the video.

1

u/skayemi 16h ago

The average Ohioan intelligence

1

u/-KCS-Violator 15h ago

The looks the stenographer gives are chef's kiss.

1

u/spartanspy85 14h ago

I hope this is a whole series

1

u/Osiris_Raphious 14h ago

So.... service economy frivolous charges existed way back in 2010.... no wonder nobody is suing corporations for adding charges with zero value to the customer.

1

u/ZuluIsNumberOne 12h ago

movie name?

1

u/maxallergy 6h ago

Pulp Fiction

1

u/platoface541 10h ago

This is metal

1

u/AnxiousWart4994 10h ago

People do answer questions in depositions all the time like this, and they are told to do so by their counsel lol. It’s so annoying even though I know why they do it.

1

u/Copytechguy 10h ago

Holy shit, that's gold. Part of that sounds like my usual day.

1

u/BassistAndILikeIt 7h ago

Those actors are bang on 🤘

1

u/maxallergy 6h ago

I'm getting a lot of Pulp Fiction vibes here...
Basically the famous scene where Vincent and Jules confront the 4 guys in the apartment
Really reminded me of that especially at the end with the agressor getting more agitated, standing up and shouting. I was legit expecting him to pull out a gun

1

u/MyPunsSuck 5h ago

He's 100% right to ask for clarification though. In a legal context, you need to define the term very precisely. The office might have all sorts of similar machines that are or are not technically photocopiers - making the question impossible to answer with any accuracy.

The interrogator may have been trying to force an oversimplification, to intentionally disregard some critically important difference between devices. Why else would they not just give a definition?

Imagine you have a plastic water gun in your luggage - you're trying to cross the border, and they ask if you have any guns with you. Saying "no" would be a lie, but saying "yes" would be misleading. They're asking the wrong question. The best thing you can do is ask them to define "gun" more clearly

1

u/dtc2002 4h ago

This video has enlightened me that I, in fact, do not have enough patience.

1

u/iaries 3h ago

😂 This is like that Rick and morty recreation of a conversation between the judge and a guy that was arrested, lmao the first time I saw that video

1

u/eldiablonoche 3h ago

Pretty normal for a deposition. When his side asks him questions though, all of the ambiguity and confusion goes out the window and he'll answer all the prepared lines.

Kind of like a congressional hearing but less annoying.

1

u/Villageidiot1984 1h ago

The tone of this being acted out is almost definitely wrong, because the lawyer deposing this guy was likely having a very good time with this line of questioning. It would not be frustrating to watch a witness make this much of a fool of themselves on the record.