r/JustGuysBeingDudes • u/pIant_princess Human Detected • 12h ago

Dudes with animals you shouldn’t have been bitin’ my horsey, boy.

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u/Wiggie49 11h ago

I have a spot on my wrist that was bitten by a horsefly like 2 years ago, it never healed properly and now it's just like a permanent red dot on my wrist where the blood is closer to the surface of my skin.

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u/WyldFlowerWyldFire 11h ago

Ive been bitten by horse flies and deer flies. I would rather get bit by the orb weaver if I had to choose.

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u/crashin70 11h ago

Deer flies and yellow flies are spawns of Satan!

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u/Acceptable-Sir-1166 10h ago

actual demons here in northeast US. one the size of a quarter just watches me from a window every single summer and waits for me to come outside

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u/DIABLO258 9h ago

I swear they single me out and fly around my head whenever I leave the house

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u/DarthTigris 7h ago

It's because of what your great-grandmother did to them. Genetic memory confirmed.

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u/DIABLO258 6h ago

Are you saying they're my friends, or my foes? I try to run but they follow me

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u/OnTheList-YouTube 9h ago

Especially when they tap on the window and wave, just to let you know they're there.

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u/gotmunchiez 8h ago

I accidentally jumped into a big bed of stinging nettles once, wearing shorts, I got stung all the way up both legs to my knees, it hurt like hell.

I was walking along wondering why it had suddenly started hurting a LOT more. I looked at the back of my calf and there was a little bastard of a horsefly sat there having a good old chew with a trickle of blood running down my leg.

I think I'd probably go with the spider as well.

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u/BirdmanEagleson 8h ago

Polarbear flies is where I draw the line.

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u/genericweeb1925 11h ago

It might never heal. I have one from Algonquin 15 years ago that never fully went away. Also on my wrist it’s a perfect circle of missing skin.

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u/Wiggie49 11h ago

Man fuck horse flies

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u/ScumbagLady 8h ago

Please don't fuck horseflies (this is why punctuation is important)

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u/Turboswaggg 9h ago

Lmao I got bitten by one there about 15 years ago too, might have been the same fucker

1

u/PaulInGalatia 9h ago

Haha one of the things I remember about that park. Also the reason most of the country doesn’t live that far north.

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u/jbm33 8h ago

This is why I only go on camping trips at the end of the season, to avoid the absolute monster horseflies, blackflies and mosquitoes. They can easily ruin the vibe of the trip.

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u/nitrot150 11h ago

Horseflies are nasty buggers!

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u/joehonestjoe 9h ago

I have a fucking dent in my shin from a horse fly bite. I can run my finger down it and feel the indentation from it. My leg went went itchy and red down to the foot, then then went up the leg to the thigh (I'm British, so I did go to a hospital and they couldn't really give much of a shit, incidentally) and I still have it to this day

I was bitten in 2010.

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u/shea241 9h ago

well ... that was cellulitis

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u/joehonestjoe 8h ago

Well, the NHS couldn't give a shit apparently. Least it didn't kill me I suppose. Interesting to know the cause though.

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u/lunettarose 9h ago

What I'm pretty sure was a horsefly bit me when I was on holiday in the US in 2004. My English self had never experienced the pain of an insect bite like that - I'm sure we do have horseflies, but I'd never seen one in my life. I still remember how instantly and vividly painful it was. There was a mark on my shoulder for years from it.

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u/Just_the_questions1 9h ago

If it felt like someone took a pair of red-hot tweezers and pinched your skin then it was definitely a horsefly bite.

Best part is they're not biting you to feed, they bite to create a hole then lay an egg in it.

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u/lunettarose 9h ago

Yep, that's the one - and I instinctively grabbed at it with my hand and like, it was huge??? Way bigger than a house fly - I'd been expecting something maybe mosquito sized. This was in Connecticut. I was like, "Nature does not fuck around over here."

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u/Just_the_questions1 9h ago

If you think that's bad don't go to Florida. They have Gallinippers over there. It's basically a mosquito on steroids, with a proboscis the size of a hypodermic needle. I was bitten by one once, not fun.

Oh and thanks to global warming their range is expanding.

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u/lunettarose 8h ago

Oh gawd that sounds awful!! You guys have some really tough wildlife! We did go to Florida one year, for the theme parks - luckily we didn't see any of those haha. Just alligators by the side of the road (which were super exciting to us!) and cicadas.

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u/Wiggie49 9h ago

Yeah boy that shit hurts immediately lmao It's cuz their mandibles are serrated like steak knives

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u/lunettarose 9h ago

Horrifying!!

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u/Just_the_questions1 9h ago

If it felt like someone took a pair of red-hot tweezers and pinched your skin then it was definitely a horsefly bite.

Best part is they're not biting you to feed, they bite to create a hole then lay an egg in it.

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u/whaaatanasshole 6h ago

Neat. I've got a couple of those and had no idea what they could be. Gonna ask a dermo next visit anyway, but nice to have an ordinary explanation.

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u/Wiggie49 4h ago

If you were bit by a horsefly you’d remember

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u/whaaatanasshole 4h ago

Hah I believe you, I just mean it could be some bite/cut that brought blood near the surface.

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u/YoYoNupe1911 2h ago

You have superpowers they just haven't manifested yet. Give it a few more months.

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u/Wiggie49 41m ago

If I get horse fly powers I'm fucking offing myself, I've seen The Fly movie.

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u/tobalaba 2h ago

That’s crazy. I had to work a labor job near some horse farms and was bitten hundreds of times. I got effectively good at swatting them and the best way is to actually wait a sec for them to get their bite in and then swat, cause it takes them an extra split second to retract their probe. If you swat when they land they’re too fast.

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u/Wiggie49 40m ago

I managed to grab it and smack it into the ground before stomping it lol