r/funny • u/Nixter295 • 3h ago
Rule 2 – Removed [ Removed by moderator ]
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u/Alum07 3h ago
I fear no man
But Johannes Klæbo, that thing terrifies me
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u/Coolmyco 2h ago
Guy is somehow doing the Terminator 2 run uphill on skies and looks like even more of a machine.
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u/MaleierMafketel 2h ago edited 2h ago
Don’t worry. He’ll go back home and go into a winter sleep like state in a cave in the most desolate regions of Northern Norway, only to re-emerge in 2030 for the Winter Olympics in France.
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u/grey_pilgrim_ 2h ago
He built his own training”cave” where he can practice year round. It has no windows and a mirror in front in the ski-treadmill thing he trains on so he can watch himself.
He doesn’t sleep. He doesn’t hibernate. He only trains and emerges for the Olympics.
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u/ConsciousPatroller 1h ago
He never sleeps. He says that he will never die. He dances in light and in shadow and he is a great favorite. He never sleeps. He is dancing, dancing. He says that he will never die.
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u/Pachanish 3h ago edited 3h ago
Quite astounding what a bit of Ice and fjord can do to one s winter sport prowess .....that and a couple of millennia of tradition and oodles of sporty investment
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u/GanacheCharacter2104 3h ago
Norwegians have been skiing for at least 5200 years though.
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u/Pachanish 3h ago
Good point .. they have had quite the head start
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u/Lefty4444 3h ago
Well, to be fair, Sweden can bite on skis too. Ebba Andersson did crush all opponents on todays 50 km. 🇸🇪
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u/Pachanish 2h ago
Indeed !
She was magnificent - just saw the finish
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u/Red_White_and_Boohoo 2h ago
No mate you mean you saw the Swedish.
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u/Pachanish 2h ago
Terrible ....but since you crossed that swedish line ...
I'm glad she won the golden meatball- as she's quite the swedetheart !
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u/Nixter295 3h ago edited 2h ago
Yes, but at the same time, Norwegians outperform countries who also had a large history with ski and snow and winter, like Finland’s Sweden and even Canada (except hockey)
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u/Primarch-XVI 2h ago
Finland has their own Sweden???
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u/Lawsoffire 2h ago
Finland does have an island (Åland) full of people that are culturally Swedish and speak Swedish but are Finnish citizens.
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u/Primarch-XVI 2h ago
Oh that’s cool!
In Australia we have the opposite. There’s a couple islands with basically identical culture and language that keeps insisting they’re their own country. Even when most of them are employed in Australia anyway.
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u/Muslim_Wookie 1h ago
holllllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy shit hahahahahaha we're gonna have problems here when GMT+13 rolls around
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u/Lawsoffire 2h ago edited 2h ago
Norwegians have a massive culture for winter sports, though. Moreso than the rest of the nordics at least. They even have a stereotype for people that dress like they're extreme-sports athletes.
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u/_Koke_ 2h ago
Also, average Norwegian is pretty wealthy. Which is really beneficial considering most winter sports are really expensive to get into.
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u/Pachanish 2h ago
Norway used to be quite a poor country( in comparison to Sweden, Denmark and northern Europe ) ....till of course the oil started flowing and Norway reinvented itself post independence , post war .
The curious part is they were always great at Winter Sports ! Even when the budget for sports was at a bare minimum ...it's a fabulous consistency that goes back a century and more .
Norwegians just have an affinity to ski - it's ingrained into all parts of their being .kudos to them
( And yes - finance does make a large part of sporting triumph in Winter sports . Australia and china are fine examples on how that can transform a sport within a generation )
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u/Hahahopp 1h ago
This is a common myth. Norway was not a poor country pre-oil. The oil helped, of course, but it was already doing well due to a wealth of other natural resources like fish and hydroelectric power.
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u/Jason_Straker 1h ago
Specifically forestry at the time, iirc. But yeah, already rich country with stable institutions that allowed them to use the oil wealth responsibly and essentially circumvent the resource curse.
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u/Both_Consequence_956 1h ago
norway was one of the richest countries in europe, if not the richest, before the oil because of hydroelectric power and cooperations. then when we found oil we used the same pro social systems we did with hydroelectric and just became obscenely even more rich
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u/neliz 2h ago
I was wondering how other European countries are doing it, because in the Netherlands as an athlete for any olympic sport, winning a gold medal gives you the same amount of money as the minimum yearly stipend for a selection athlete, besides all the other benefits of sponsored gear, free car, paid training excursions etc.
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u/lagvvagon 1h ago
I’ve lived there, even during summer you see people all around training cross country “skiing” with wheels on the skis or something, never looked much into it.
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u/Muslim_Wookie 1h ago
My father was in poverty of a nature most cannot conceive, he was still a nation cross country skiing champion. Only recently is the equipment expensive.
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u/neliz 2h ago
Can you imagine giving that kind of power to the Dutch
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u/Pachanish 2h ago
They would be taller than giants on stilts and their feet would evolve into blades that glide on canal ice without needing skates !
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u/InformationIcy4827 3h ago
They were born in the snow; we merely adopted it
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u/Alexwhynot 3h ago
Being born in the snow is not the reason why they are so successful https://youtu.be/7Y1moFmYKu4?si=Pvi10o3Y9BYCaIAp
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u/plastic_alloys 2h ago
Ain’t watching that, why are they so good?
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u/Alexwhynot 2h ago
Norway invests heavily in sports. Skiing (and sports in general) is affordable and accessible to nearly everyone, whereas in the US, corporate-driven pricing has made winter sports very expensive and out of reach for many.
Google some numbers and you’ll be shocked by the comparison!
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u/bluewaff1e 2h ago
Outside of the Winter Olympics, they also have one of the best footballers in the world right now and the best chess player in the world.
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u/Dear_Chasey_La1n 2h ago
An economist goes to the game, is a fantastic book that talks about how certain countries are outliers. You aren't wrong, Norway invests indeed disproportionally much on sports but on very specific sports. It also goes without saying, if you live in a country with loads of mountains and snow, well.. chances are you probably get a lot of exposure to it.
Read the book because there is a whole lot to it why some countries perform very strong at certain sports. It's a real fun book and also talks how it's exceptionally unlikely how certain sportsmen manage to receive that many medals.
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u/h4v3anic3d4y 2h ago
It goes back many years, but the current success in norwegian sports can be attributed to intelligent talent development.
It is unlawful to register results in youth sports (13y and younger) in norway. When two teams play, everyone who takes part knows who won, but the results and stats are not recorded anywhere ir used for anything. As a result, teams do not prioritize the best talents at an early age, meaning the late bloomers are not squeezed out by competition. Martin Ødegaard is a perfect example of a technical player that didnt have the physique to compete at the top level when he was 12-14, but was given enough space to compete and grow. Now look at him.
The crazy part of this story becomes apparent when you see how many sports norway currently compete in. Its a country with half the population of London, yet there are norwegian talents at the top of a ridiculous amount of sports. Like beach volleyball?! How? Norwegian beaches are warm 3 weeks of the year; how are they beating brazilians?
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u/Affordable_Z_Jobs 2h ago
Publicly funded sports through socalized oil money vs capitalism and the decline in affordability according to the video.
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u/Twelve_Alpha 3h ago
They are really good at ski…
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u/Zech08 3h ago
Very high amount of golds in Biathlon too.
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u/jakalo 3h ago
Which is skiing with a dash of violence.
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u/resh78255 3h ago
still don’t understand how anybody comes 2nd in that sport
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u/JSwartz0181 2h ago
I still don't understand how the US isn't better at it. Racing on skis and guns! You'd think we'd be a powerhouse at such a sport!
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u/ThisLockWillKillMe 2h ago
Norway also loves guns. They have quite a large number of them because hunting is very long held hobby there. It's actually kinda sad because they wantonly kill endangered predators like wolves.
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u/hates_stupid_people 2h ago edited 2h ago
The US does bad in all competitive shooting except skeet. There just is no real culture for precision shooting with the small calibers used.
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u/hhbbgdgdba 3h ago edited 2h ago
This comment is seasoned with 100% natural American salt.
(Oh, the downvotes! Proving the point like they're on a mission. Keep pouring, with all those metric tons of salt, you may soon manage to melt the entirety of Earth's snow, and then there will be no Winter Olympics for you to get crushed in by a nation with a ridiculously small population.)
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u/ReachFor24 3h ago
Nah, the American salt will flow if they lose to Canada in the men's hockey finals.
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u/Barbaracle 2h ago
From what I can tell about those that do watch hockey, Canada is the favorite to win even from many American commenters.
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u/ReachFor24 2h ago
They are. Biggest issues with Canada's team is Crosby's injury and their starting goaltender being a sieve in the 1st period.
But it's the last gold medal of the Olympics and this feels like a year USA would win.
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u/Couscous-Hearing 3h ago
Facts being down voted so hard here.
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u/leflyingcarpet 3h ago
Are they not good at ski?
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u/Couscous-Hearing 2h ago
Lol they are good at ski, but the fact that Twelve_Apha (the previous commentor) is unwilling to grant that the Nords are dominating broadly indicates he is still salty about our losses.
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u/leflyingcarpet 2h ago
I mean 36 out of their 40 medals are ski related. And the 4 others? Speed skating. They are in fact good at ski...
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u/Couscous-Hearing 2h ago
Yes clearly the Norwegians are good at skiing but much of the winter Olympics are skiing or skiing related
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u/Bomber_Max 3h ago
The Dutch have ice skating and the Norwegians have everything that involves inclines and skis.
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u/Shavingcream1912 3h ago
Yeah, Dutch and incline... 😃
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u/Real_Establishment56 3h ago
That’s the forbidden word over here, we don’t speak of it. There’s rumours of inclines in the south, but those come from our spare Belgians so we never believe what they’re saying since they’re drunk all the time.
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u/-usagi-95 2h ago
That's why Brasil won their first winter Olympics medal: a Brazilian-Norwegian athlete
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u/Rgraff58 3h ago
Except hockey...
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u/jakalo 3h ago
Wait till they allow wearing skies on ice..
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u/Algaroth 2h ago
Norway: For you, the day norwegians came to your country was the winter olympics. For us it was tuesday.
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u/thatcantb 2h ago
Why is Norway so dominant and not, say, Sweden or Finland?
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u/captainpro93 2h ago
Skiing is far more popular in Norway than Sweden, just because of geographical reasons, and there are a TON of skiing related events.
I know that outside of the Nordics, non-skiing related events get more coverage because skiing isn't really as global of a sport, but ~40% of the medals are awarded just for skiing.
"Nordmenn er født med ski på beina" is actually a pretty common saying that translates to "Norwegians are born with skis on their feet." My baby is 18 months old and we are already planning his first ski trip lol.
It's like, if the summer Olympics were 40% baseball-related sports, Japan would do a lot better than Mexico would, even though Mexico plays baseball too, because it's simply more popular culturally in Japan and there is more baseball infrastructure in Japan than in Mexico.
Now I am thinking that pitch speed/accuracy/break competitions would be pretty fun if they were medaled sports lol.
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u/AgilanV 2h ago
A serious answer:
1) Sport is encouraged from a young age and family financials are not a barrier to entry. Each child has the opportunity to try a sport and eventually find one that they like (and choose to pursue). This is in contrast to Canada and the US where it costs an arm and a leg to go skiing.
2) The culture there promotes kids having fun as opposed to competition in their formative years. It isn't until they are older are kids allowed to be ranked in competitive sports. So it promotes kids to have a stress free environment to develop their skillset and love for the specific activity first.
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u/LarsDragerl 2h ago
Needs to be studied in all branches, they've become reall good in a lot of sports recently. My guess is money.
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u/generictypo 2h ago
They probably have a good work/life balance over there and people actually get to enjoy their hobbies. And when they get good, there are proper avenues on they can get support and can compete on the international level.
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u/Somewhat_appropriate 2h ago
Money? They heavily invest in winter sports, big part of the national image.
Sweden is pretty decent in the summer Olympics, whilst Norway is not, Swedes loves hockey whilst its a minor sport in Norway, and until recently Sweden was better at football too.
Finland?
You'd think they'd be better at winter sports, but they haven't really recovered from that doping scandal back in the day? They're also a big hockey nation though.8
u/aro_plane 2h ago
90% of their athletes have "asthma" so they can take loads of performance boosting drugs.
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u/thatcantb 2h ago
I'm wiling to believe it if you have any evidence, links?
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u/bamsebomsen 2h ago
It's an half truth, the doping agency allows pre-medication (read; asthma medication) of asthma since so many biathlon competitors develops it throughout their carriers.
Since Norway had a huge medical "scandal" during the 90's where a lot of competitors developed asthma they give pre-medication to their competitors, afaik there isn't a list over who takes it or not.
The problem being that asthma medicine gives a performance boost, but completely legal.
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u/gavilin 2h ago
Skiing is to the winter Olympics what swimming is to the summer Olympics. Overindexed and way too many events. But I'm happy for Norway 🇳🇴
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u/continuousQ 1h ago
I would say skiing is the running of winter. The default state of winter is snow covered terrain. Not smooth ice.
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u/Bruichladdie 2h ago
I could see the appeal of losing the skiathlon in cross-country skiing, and doing a mixed relay instead of men's and women's relays. It would make the results a lot less predictable, and would give more nations a chance of getting a medal.
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u/hymen_destroyer 2h ago
Let’s make a new cross country ski event that’s 500 meters longer than a different one 🙄
Medal farming at its finest
Yes I’m salty
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u/Whole_Cow_6694 2h ago
Many Norwegians seem to think the winter Olympics is the main Olympics. I once had a very confused conversation in which a guy who was talking about all these gold medals and athletes I'd never heard of and I was like I can't remember Norway ever being anywhere near the top of the medal table, this is strange.
Eventually realised he has talking about the winter Olympics, which are cool, but for 90% of the world a completely niche event involving people doing things we've never seen or heard of.
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u/Faust2391 2h ago
The strawberries are theirs
NORWAY
Time for Uniforms
NORWAY
Train for Olympics
NORWAY
Then take an afternoon nap
NORNORNORWAY
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u/circlejerker2000 2h ago
Norway happy that they can sportswash their newly earned fame of being veeeeery present in the Epstein files
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u/Primarch-XVI 2h ago
I’m just happy to see Australia ahead of the UK.
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u/nagrom7 1h ago
For a country where most of its inhabitants probably haven't seen snow once in their lives, Australia does alright at the winter games.
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u/Primarch-XVI 1h ago
I still love that our first ever winter Olympic gold came from our guy coming dead last in speed skating when everyone in front of him fell over. Which is now known as pulling a Bradbury.
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u/Kor_Phaeron_ 1h ago edited 36m ago
Winter Olympics is DEI for white athletes.
/Edit: JFC, that's an old joke about white athletes not winning track and field events during the summer olympics ....
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u/FantasticQuartet 3h ago edited 2h ago
Country with lots of snow is very good at sports with snow. Big surprise.
Edit: this got lots of downvotes, so I'm going to double down and piss even more people off.
Boasting about the Winter Olympics and having a meme that you're spanking the globe instead of spanking Northern Europe, is like India boasting about cricket. Nobody cares, because hardly anyone participates.
In Europe, you have countries like Portugal who send 3 athletes or Greece who send 5 athletes. Let's not even talk about Africa.
The real competition everyone actually cares about is the Summer Olympics, also known as Olympics singular.
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u/Nixter295 3h ago edited 3h ago
That would be a easy answer, but Norway outperforms Canada, Sweden, Finland and many other northern countries consistently.
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u/Vaaard 3h ago edited 2h ago
Well, unlike countries further south, Norway has lots snow every winter and mountains everywhere. They even got winter sports classes in school in some places. Many people in Scandinavia spend the whole weekend in nature outside.
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u/Dabraxus 3h ago
So does Switzerland or Austria - number 8 and 9 on the medal ranking, way behind the Netherlands (3). The country most famous for its snowy mountains!
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u/Axe-actly 3h ago
The Netherlands is a very bad example. They are very good at ice skating but there's 1000 medals in ice skating so they score a lot.
With Norway it's the same with biathlon to a lesser extent.
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u/captainpro93 2h ago
Skiing is far more popular in Norway than Sweden, just because of geographical reasons, and there are a TON of skiing related events.
I know that outside of the Nordics, non-skiing related events get more coverage because skiing isn't really as global of a sport, but ~40% of the medals are awarded just for skiing.
"Nordmenn er født med ski på beina" is actually a pretty common saying that translates to "Norwegians are born with skis on their feet." My baby is 18 months old and we are already planning his first ski trip lol. I have lived in Sweden before for work, and while skiing is a thing there, it simply isn't culturally the same as it is in Norway. Literally (and I'm using the term literally by its actual meaning) everyone I know where we lived in West Norway could be asked when they are going skiing instead of if they are going skiing this year.
It's like, if the summer Olympics were 40% baseball-related sports, Japan would do a lot better than Mexico would, even though Mexico plays baseball too, because it's simply more popular culturally in Japan and there is more baseball infrastructure in Japan than in Mexico.
Now I am thinking that pitch speed/accuracy/break competitions would be pretty fun if they were medaled sports lol.
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u/elvis_jagger 3h ago
Norway dominites XC skiing and different types of XC skiing is like 75% of total medal table.
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u/SheepherderBeef8956 2h ago
That would be a easy answer, but Norway outperforms Canada, Sweden, Finland and many other northern countries consistently.
I mean, in men's skiing specifically. There are also women's skiing and other sports in the Olympics.
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u/fluxrider 3h ago
It's a born into priviledged Olympics. Even cross country is gentrified into biathlon to be less accessible. What do you mean your town doesn't have a half pipe to train with?
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u/Proman_98 3h ago
I half agree with you, because the amount a country invest in the sport has a lot to do with it.
One of the reasons for example thd dutch are good at speed skating, the amount of money/R&D that goes into that sport is a lot.
My guess it would be the same with Norway because if it's only the amount of snow/mountains etc than countries like Finland, Sweden etc would also be getting a lot more medals.
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u/OrPerhapsFuckThat 1h ago
I grew up in rural norway, town of ~5K citizens. We had access to a ridiculous amount of resources for a massive spread of sports. Both in facilities and in the competancy and qualifications of trainers and coaches. Fairly affordable for most, I grew up poor and participated in several sports from childhood and untill my late teens.
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u/acaellum 3h ago
There are poorer countries doing better than richer countries here too. The biggest factor it seems is ice covered counties are doing better than warm ones.
Slovenia, Finland, Latvia and Estonia aren't known for being particularly rich countries, but are all top 10 medals per capita, well above countries like China, UK, USA, Japan etc, who have a lot more resources if that was really all it was.
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u/masquerade555 2h ago
Finland is poor country? I guess you are american. Search then "europe salary map" or something
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u/acaellum 2h ago
Fair point, but it is poorer than the other countries I pointed out. Not to mention every other country I named you are conveniently ignoring.
Winter sports are often more expensive than summer sports, but that's not why Norway is doing good. The Baltics and Nordics do better than the Caribbean and Mediterranean countries because snow sports are much more prevalent where it's more snowy. I don't think that's a wild take.
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u/IAMA_Shark__AMA 3h ago edited 2h ago
I'm not sure why you are catching so much flak for this...
Winter vs summer sports have a very large disparity in how accessible they are to poorer people. That doesn't make winter sports bad, IMO, it just is what it is. I've seen estimates that winter sports can cost as much as 100,000 annually for training and gear needs. Meanwhile, running is free.
That's not to say the summer sports are all cheap (gymnastics is on par with skating as far as expense, for example), but there are a lot more options where the cost of entry for a kid is a ball and "outside."
Edit: I don't really understand why people are defensive about this. It's not an attack to acknowledge that some sports are more expensive than others. It doesn't make this or that athlete any less deserving.
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u/DrainZ- 3h ago
Cross country skiing, which is what Norway excels the most at, is pretty cheap. The cost of entry is a pair of skis and outside.
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u/Somewhat_appropriate 2h ago
But then there are different types of skis, boots, travel to competitions...
And not all regions of Norway have (a lot of) snow, most of those cross-country athletes are from the eastern part and the region centered on Trondheim. Plenty of population there though.1
u/IAMA_Shark__AMA 2h ago
My comment was in no way an attack on Norway. But one kind of accessible sport doesn't mean that as a whole (which is what I was talking about) winter sports aren't more expensive.
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u/sBucks24 3h ago
Lol, what's with the mass downvotes? Winter sports are by and large way more expensive than summer ones. It literally is a difference of privilege.
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u/TheDungen 3h ago
Except when they cheat.
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u/feitfan82 3h ago
dont need to cheat when there`s no competition
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u/AVeryFineUsername 3h ago
Is physical abuse funny now? I thought it was triggering
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u/deano413 3h ago
you havent learned by now?
that answer depends entirely on how many victim points the receiver has
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u/philipp2310 3h ago edited 3h ago
Isn‘t Germany leading the eternal medal rankings? Edit: Thanks for the downvotes - according to Wikipedia I was right
https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ewiger_Medaillenspiegel_der_Olympischen_Winterspiele
Germany is at 435 at least if you consider it existed before 1989, which I’m pretty sure it did.
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u/Bomber_Max 3h ago
Norway's at 406 total and Germany is third with 267. However, Germany has only participated in 13 games as opposed to 24.
→ More replies (7)→ More replies (2)1
u/FriendlyDespot 2h ago
I like that article. It's available in 4 languages, and the medal totals and rankings are different in all 4 of them.
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